So... I've been with my veteran for nearly five years. We've been living together for four years. In that time he has been verbally abusive and on one occasion physically abusive. He has always had old fashioned ideas of appropriate behaviour between men and women. He has always said that dishonesty and disloyalty are the ultimate sins.
Imagine my surprise to discover that he had been in contact with an ex-girlfriend behind my back - had had coffee with her some months ago without telling me and that on at least one occasion had contacted her and asked her for relationship advice!
When I pointed out to him that he had been dishonest and disloyal he initially denied that he had been and said that he had done nothing wrong. He has since apologised to me and is behaving like he did when we first met - nothing but sweetness and light - no lashing out at the moment. Trouble is I feel absolutely numb about it.
I am seriously considering ending the relationship over this. I don't trust him anymore. Am I over-reacting?
Imagine my surprise to discover that he had been in contact with an ex-girlfriend behind my back - had had coffee with her some months ago without telling me and that on at least one occasion had contacted her and asked her for relationship advice!
When I pointed out to him that he had been dishonest and disloyal he initially denied that he had been and said that he had done nothing wrong. He has since apologised to me and is behaving like he did when we first met - nothing but sweetness and light - no lashing out at the moment. Trouble is I feel absolutely numb about it.
I am seriously considering ending the relationship over this. I don't trust him anymore. Am I over-reacting?