Unique body split, dissociation. I have a body split, I can only feel emotions on one side of my body and brain. Has anyone else have this?

MW1

New Here
I have CPTSD and the structural dissociative breakdown as what appears to be OSDD. I can only feel emotions on one side of my body, including the brain. I feel nothing on my left side. My brain on my left side never feels tired, sore, fatigued. I could smoke weed, and I won't feel high on my left side of my brain. "I don't smoke weed anymore." If I drink alcohol, the same problem, I am only drunk on my right side of my brain and feel nothing on my left sphere of the brain that I can feel. "I don't drink anymore either."

Therapists, the internet, and even myself getting into contact with Pete Walker, the author of the book "Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Surviving to Thriving," told me that he has never seen anything like this before. He called it a phenomenon. I know that I have been abused like so many of you in your childhoods. I have read many books on childhood abuse; I understand structural dissociation quite well. Nowhere in the literature have I ever found a dissociative case with these symptoms before in the literature. I feel alone and frustrated that I cannot find someone else with these same symptoms. Or anything in dissociative books, for that matter. I feel intense chronic pain in my right side of my body. In my chest, spine, head. I am addicted to nicotine from a vaporizer. I only feel the addiction on my right side of my body, not the left.

I am desperate to find someone else who has this type of dissociation presence. I would be grateful to find others. Some of the literature for DID has spoken of left and right body split. But there was insufficient information to explain this further. As far as I know, I don't have DID. But do I and don't realize it. I don't seem to have blackouts, but I do have a difficult memory. People do say at work things I did that I cannot recall. Usually, when I am in trouble. But often cannot remember doing those things, but I am sure I did not blackout. I do feel some sense of continuity. And if it is not, then I am incredible at hiding DID. But as far as I am concern, it is OSDD. Thanks so much to anyone who has the same experience I have. This split is chronic and has been around for several decades now in my life.
 

bellbird

Sponsor
Welcome to the community :)
My brain on my left side never feels tired, sore, fatigued.
Your brain itself? Or do you mean your head?
Your brain itself cannot feel pain, because there are no pain receptors (nociceptors) in the brain, which is why deep brain stimulation patients only require local anaesthesia during surgery.

What you're experiencing in your body sounds a lot like functional sensory symptoms, but I'm no expert.
There's a link to a webpage about them here, or literature here.

Have you been to see a neurologist to have your experience assessed? If not, I'd definitely suggest you do.
 

Friday

Moderator
I remember studying it in school, briefly. (If I’m recalling correctly) There are 2 basic types of not being able to feel the physical effects of emotions... a hemispheric issue (LOTS of potential causes: TBI, seizure, tumor, etc.)... or a peripheral nervous system issue, most commonly caused by damage to the spine at some point, but also infections, tumors, stenosis, etc..

But even those 2 broad categories? Have a whooooooole lot of possible causes.

Ditto @bellbird ... If you haven’t seen a neurologist? See a neurologist. Pronto.

As... yeah. That would be a very unique kind of disassociation, IE sounds nothing at all like disassociation, but a super common indication of a neurological problem, with dozens of potential causes.
 
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MW1

New Here
Welcome to the community :)

Your brain itself? Or do you mean your head?
Your brain itself cannot feel pain, because there are no pain receptors (nociceptors) in the brain, which is why deep brain stimulation patients only require local anaesthesia during surgery.

What you're experiencing in your body sounds a lot like functional sensory symptoms, but I'm no expert.
There's a link to a webpage about them here, or literature here.

Have you been to see a neurologist to have your experience assessed? If not, I'd definitely suggest you do.
I guess the head. I have discovered dissociative seizures expressing that you may feel weak on one side or heavy on the other side. But the episode is supposed not to last very long. I believe that it is possible and theorized from my therapist that it is a disconnect from emotional pain. Or that I am operating two ANP'S at the same time. One side can feel the other side, but the other brain sphere cannot feel the other. However, this relates to my entire left side sensory, but not physical pain sensors. I do believe that this is dissociation as people have body parts that feel numb. I will enquire about a neurologist. But I am skeptical that they know anything really about dissociation and its effects on the brain. I will check out the functional sensory symptoms, thank you so much.
 

bellbird

Sponsor
But I am skeptical that they know anything really about dissociation and its effects on the brain
I'd try to see it as less I'm going to find a neurologist who knows about dissociation, but more I'm going to find a neurologist who can rule out any (potentially harmful) neurological causes for what I'm experiencing.

Using myself as an example: I experience psychogenic seizures when I am extremely stressed. But before we could know for sure they were psychogenic, I had an EEG done at the hospital that was reviewed by a neurologist so that we could safely rule out other, more dangerous, causes of the seizures such as epilepsy.

Psychogenic and epileptic seizures present very similarly, but have entirely different causes and therefore have entirely different treatments (both preventatively and during an episode).
 

MW1

New Here
I'd try to see it as less I'm going to find a neurologist who knows about dissociation, but more I'm going to find a neurologist who can rule out any (potentially harmful) neurological causes for what I'm experiencing.

Using myself as an example: I experience psychogenic seizures when I am extremely stressed. But before we could know for sure they were psychogenic, I had an EEG done at the hospital that was reviewed by a neurologist so that we could safely rule out other, more dangerous, causes of the seizures such as epilepsy.

Psychogenic and epileptic seizures present very similarly, but have entirely different causes and therefore have entirely different treatments (both preventatively and during an episode).
You’re giving me valuable information—the first. I did review the hemispheres sensory paper you sent me. I am still studying it. It is very good. I have had this split since I was at least 12 yrs. But interesting enough, I did not recognize it until four years ago. It has been so long I always believed that where I feel the pain on the right side was the issue. The left side is okay, but it is not. Thank you for your response.
 

MW1

New Here
I remember studying it in school, briefly. (If I’m recalling correctly) There are 2 basic types of not being able to feel the physical effects of emotions... a hemispheric issue (LOTS of potential causes: TBI, seizure, tumor, etc.)... or a peripheral nervous system issue, most commonly caused by damage to the spine at some point, but also infections, tumors, stenosis, etc..

But even those 2 broad categories? Have a whooooooole lot of possible causes.

Ditto @bellbird ... If you haven’t seen a neurologist? See a neurologist. Pronto.

As... yeah. That would be a very unique kind of disassociation, IE sounds nothing at all like disassociation, but a super common indication of a neurological problem, with dozens of potential causes.
Thank you so much for the reply. I will see a neurologist again. I am still suspecting dissociation somewhat because of the symptoms of body numbness issues of others. However, there is a paper another person has sent me about hemisphere sensory syndrome, which is promising. However, I still have CPSTD with OSDD that needs attention. I have seen a therapist now for over three years—an EMDR type. But there has not been a reduction in symptoms. My resistance has been so futile.

thank you for the help. I appreciated it very much. Thank you, thank you.
 
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ruborcoraxxx

MyPTSD Pro
I have something of the sort, with all sorts of pain being much more present on the right side, but it’s also the side I suffered a massive TBI. Reminds me that I should have a checkup.
 
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