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Want To Jump Off This Rollercoaster!

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Can you believe it - I got about 4 hours sleep last night. That's the most for weeks! I must admit, I had a small alcoholic beverage, which I know is naughty, but I had tried everything else.

Best not make a habit of it though :)
Hey... do what you need to do during the bad times... and you answered the rest yourself... "don't make a habit of it." Damn we are all getting very clever here... I think we all need to give ourselves a pat on the back for helping one another out... Well done everyone, and great to hear you got some sleep Piglet... Congrats.
I actually did the same a month ago, when I was really shit, about 3 or 4 nights straight I had a few light beers at night to help me sleep.
Wow piglet, good job on recognizing the importance in controlling the use of alcohol/drugs.

But if 4 hours of sleep is alot for you right now, and you are returning to work, you should seriously consider talking to your Doctor about some sleeping aids. Not for everynight, but something you can take if you have a big day and can't get to sleep because of anxiety. You don't want to burn yourself out
Have discussed sleeping pills on a few occasions. I have preferred not to have them, as I feel I might be too tempted to take the whole lot in one go. Also, the doc said it might make my nightmares worse - no way I'm taking that risk - I'd rather stay awake!

I survived my first appointment with the therapist. She was straight talking and did not say she could cure me, but that she might be able to help me deal with things better. She also said that i'm probably going back to work too soon, but I knew that already! We did not discuss diagnosis and I think I am ok with that. If work want one, they can pay for me to go get one!

Work went ok. I didn't have to teach, so I just spent the morning tracking down my files from all corners of the earth and sorting through 200+ e-mails. I have yet to pick up my new timetable, but I already know I am teaching 6 out of 8 sessions tomorrow.

Going to collapse in a heap in front of the tv and then take the dog for a stroll. May also partake of some alcoholic beverage at some point.
Good to hear that you sort off atleast had a bit of a wear in period at work, ie. not thrown straight into teaching. Great to hear that you handled it a bit better than you expected. Take it easy, break yourself in slowly, and most definately don't push yourself.

Congratulations on the return to work... and very big achievement... huge actually... well done.
Piglet, I too had the same problem. Two hours of sleep here and there (never all at once) Anxious about seemingly ( I say this because nothing is without reason) with no cause at all. Not knowing what was wrong, I had tons of energy (high point for this my house was spotless lol ) I finally just sat myself down and listened to what was going on in my head. It was easy just to go with the hyper feeling, but I was so tired and couldn't sleep. I had trouble concentrating at first, God, I did not want too look to hard at what was going through my mind...such a scary place :)...tried to separate the things I could control over the things I couldn't. Hell waking up when I finally did sleep was hard enough, choosing to wake was a tough choice at one point. Give yourself credit, you're here right? Part of personal strength is knowing that you need help, by help I mean perspective, you'll get plenty here, You can manage this, you already have...and the one thing you do need to know is you are not alone...
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