Way too much has happened in 1 day and I'm hyperventilating

SeekingAfrica

MyPTSD Pro
So I was severely depressed since the start of December, to a point of not working and barely functioning . I've been slowly trying to get back on my feet. I've been one step from being evicted for weeks (along with making partial payments when I can).
I've been trying to get back to work.

Now l have one old client return finally paying on 15th. Then today I got 2 mini-gigs (15$ total but every cent/dime matters). These are for making drawings and discussing details about them was a lot of adrenaline for me because it's been so long since I've done that. Also my old father fell(I'm visiting) and today was xrays (2 broken ribs) and so the day was waiting on this and figuring out how to help him and my mom at home while keeping work deadlines while looking for more work because I need to keep my apartment.

Between New jobs and communicating with 3 clients, applying for more and waiting on xrays, and yesterday going myself to adjust my own meds because I've had this bad flare, this is like a Lot of adrenaline for a day. I know the jobs is a good thing, and I need them, and it's a point of numbers (10 mini gigs- 70$. I need that. I need every dollar). But I am a bit hyper, like I can't calm down much. Between the good and the bad anxiety and adrenaline today it feels like my head is spinning (yet l still can't pay my bills and feel desperate for even 10$) and l can't concentrate on the other mini gig I do for 20$/week.

Like, I'm working 10min at a time today and even that feels long. And even though I wrote everyone and communicated clearly and put all deadlines on my calendar, it feels like information will start falling out of my head any moment soon. How do l calm down???
 

Defaultxlove

MyPTSD Pro
Oh man. I'm following this thread. I'm in the exact same spot right now. I have taken a walk it helped temporarily buy I think it spiked my cortisol which means maybe a light slow meandering walk would have been a good idea. Can you take an adventure walk break?


To clarify. I think I pushed too hard making it worse.
 

arfie

MyPTSD Pro
gentle empathy, seeki. the only thing harder than finding a balance is keeping a balance. this business of jumping from one extreme to the other royally sucks.

i take lots of therapy breaks at both extremes. whether i'm pushing myself to get out of bed or wishing for a nap, there's such a thing as trying too hard. easy does it. making a post such as this one makes for a good therapy break. venting often makes it easier to find the new balance.

breathing with you, seeki.
 
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