What Cliche Works On Your Nerves?

[want2cope]

What cliche or sentence really gets under your skin when you hear it repeated? My cliche is "Assuming makes an ass out of me and you." Oooooooooh, that really gets my blood flowing. ;) One of x husbands use to tell me that all the time and he was my first and main abuser. What's yours? I would love to know and if you feel like sharing why that's a bonus but not a have to.....

 

[Jen93]

"Look on the bright side!" "Think happy thoughts!"- If you've been in the dark your whole life- you can't exactly see the bright side can you? If you feel dark, really, really dark- it feels like there IS no way to find anything good, so to have people say that, all cheerful when you admit you feel down... it's invalidating.

 

[want2cope]

I totally get what you are saying. It's so easy for other people who have had sheltered lives and don't know the cruel side of this world to say those things. I think sometimes they think "we" want attention, but they just don't have a clue what being internally tortured feels like. I say they are just ignorant people and even though they are cruel with things they say and do, I still would not wish my pain and suffering on them. I am not trying to be a victim here, its just the only way I can deal with self centered, more holy than thou, and judgements of people.....

Thanks for the reply.

Much love

 

[a3a2]

WHatever doesn't kill you makes you stronger.

 

[Jen93]

Good one! I've heard it on T.V, but most people I know wouldn't give me that line-that one really is condescending.. If someone ever said that to me I'd never speak to them again-even if it were my best friend.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Good one a3a2!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:cool: That was the one I was going to use. It is tired and old needs to go out with the trash.

Thank you.

 

[maddog]

Yep, the "what doesn't kill you..." one is a pet hate of mine too. I mean, what a load of rot... what doesn't kill you doesn't do anything other than not kill you. It doesn't make you stronger, weaker or anything else. Personally I think this is a thinly-veiled way for society as a whole to comfort themselves with the knowledge that those who endure the worst are somehow better equipped for it than the average person, and so there's no need to worry... it goes along with the whole "you don't get more than you can handle in life" sort of thing. Ok, great, well now that I know that I have herculian strength and endless capacity for suffering, then I feel so much better about myself.

I also hate "tomorrow is another day". Yes, how lovely, another opportunity to experience this reality over and over again. While I do accept the underlying message that it's always important to keep hanging on and to try to believe in a better place, I think this is a grossly superficial kind of invalidation about reality.

"Don't let yourself be defined by your past". Well, excuse me, but for some of us, everything that contributed to defining us as people was harmful and abusive, and it's hard not to be defined by your past when you never had an opportunity to define yourself by anything else. Of course that's not to say that you don't try to believe you can recreate yourself for the future, but to say that anyone - trauma sufferer or not - is not largely defined by their past, is simply unrealistic.

I think I'm sounding very grumpy today aren't I...

 

[Dethuan]

"good morning" that usually gets on my nerves

 

[want2cope]

Jen93,

Look on the bright side
Heard that tonight and it really urked my nerves. I also told the woman what I thought about her saying that. This week has been one Hell of a week for her to even go there.

 

[Nadege]

"Let it go!"

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Nadege,
I know what you mean. I used to ask these people how do you let go and not one of them had an a answer for me. Interesting huh?

 

[Nadege]

Yup. What's sad is that talking things out makes us feel better but people don't want to hear us. We disturb their positive safe reality, we need to apologize and shut our mouths. So where do we go? That's how I ended up here.