SeekingAfrica
Sponsor
I am freaking out a bit. I have like 20h until I travel, a bit of this evening and a bit of a morning. So really, more like 12 without sleep. I have been super nervous about travelling and I kept putting things off. I was at that point of anxiety where it takes you twice longer to finish stuff and you just don't cope. And it's a long trip (2 or 3 months).
That's how I found myself here. So anxious that I can't breathe, taking long breaks between tasks and barely keeping it together. And there is so much more to do. Mostly cleaning the apartment and packing. Since it's a long trip, I have to finish it all. Even after cutting down tasks there are too many. And my mind is at the state where I'm going between dissociating and doing things in bits and pieces and freaking out more the later it gets. And feeling faint and nauseous and wanting to not exist so I don't have to care.
How do I cope? How do I finish it all? The trip is happening one way or another. And I live alone, so no one to help. And leaving anything until tomorrow is probably worse because chances are I maybe just as anxious.
What do I do? How do I get myself together?
That's how I found myself here. So anxious that I can't breathe, taking long breaks between tasks and barely keeping it together. And there is so much more to do. Mostly cleaning the apartment and packing. Since it's a long trip, I have to finish it all. Even after cutting down tasks there are too many. And my mind is at the state where I'm going between dissociating and doing things in bits and pieces and freaking out more the later it gets. And feeling faint and nauseous and wanting to not exist so I don't have to care.
How do I cope? How do I finish it all? The trip is happening one way or another. And I live alone, so no one to help. And leaving anything until tomorrow is probably worse because chances are I maybe just as anxious.
What do I do? How do I get myself together?