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Deleted member 47099
Especially for everyone who struggled with childhood trauma, but also for others who received no or harmful education about money and finances... What do you wish you'd been taught about money as a kid?
During childhood trauma, I was "taught" some really unhelpful stuff about finances.
Things like:
- It's impossible to live on a small income
- Poverty = doom
- Finances are a scary, nightmarish issue and it's best to avoid the issue completely
- It's okay for (abusive) parents to buy random items they want, rather than feed and clothe their children
- Having a budget that covers everyone's basic needs is impossible
- Living within your means is impossible
- Having savings for emergencies is impossible
- Lack of money is a valid reason/ excuse to neglect and abuse children
I've struggled with my finances all my life, but have always somehow muddled through.
I think the "success" I've had with finances has all been fear based.
For example, I've always paid rent and bills as soon as I've gotten my monthly income, for fear of becoming homeless.
I've also been able to save some money for emergencies in the past, by completely ignoring my own needs for basic things like food, clothing, heating, etc, because that's what I was taught to do in childhood anyway.
I'm currently trying to get to a more rational, helpful headspace about money, finances, budgeting, saving.
But I'm finding that 95% of my "issues" with money and finances are from childhood trauma and are stuck in the "kid brain" part of my brain.
So I'm trying to use "teach your kids about money" websites to try and tap into the kid-brain core beliefs and behavioural patterns I have about money, like:
15 Ways to Teach Kids About Money
The 5 Most Important Money Lessons To Teach Your Kids
Anyway, I'm also wondering what others who experienced childhood trauma wish they'd been taught about money and finances?
Or if you want to vent about it, what unhelpful and abusive crap you *were* taught about money and finances?
Or, for those who didn't experience childhood trauma, what were the most helpful things you were taught about money? Can you explain these in a way that makes sense to people who learned only negative or useless messages about money during childhood?
During childhood trauma, I was "taught" some really unhelpful stuff about finances.
Things like:
- It's impossible to live on a small income
- Poverty = doom
- Finances are a scary, nightmarish issue and it's best to avoid the issue completely
- It's okay for (abusive) parents to buy random items they want, rather than feed and clothe their children
- Having a budget that covers everyone's basic needs is impossible
- Living within your means is impossible
- Having savings for emergencies is impossible
- Lack of money is a valid reason/ excuse to neglect and abuse children
I've struggled with my finances all my life, but have always somehow muddled through.
I think the "success" I've had with finances has all been fear based.
For example, I've always paid rent and bills as soon as I've gotten my monthly income, for fear of becoming homeless.
I've also been able to save some money for emergencies in the past, by completely ignoring my own needs for basic things like food, clothing, heating, etc, because that's what I was taught to do in childhood anyway.
I'm currently trying to get to a more rational, helpful headspace about money, finances, budgeting, saving.
But I'm finding that 95% of my "issues" with money and finances are from childhood trauma and are stuck in the "kid brain" part of my brain.
So I'm trying to use "teach your kids about money" websites to try and tap into the kid-brain core beliefs and behavioural patterns I have about money, like:
15 Ways to Teach Kids About Money
The 5 Most Important Money Lessons To Teach Your Kids
Anyway, I'm also wondering what others who experienced childhood trauma wish they'd been taught about money and finances?
Or if you want to vent about it, what unhelpful and abusive crap you *were* taught about money and finances?
Or, for those who didn't experience childhood trauma, what were the most helpful things you were taught about money? Can you explain these in a way that makes sense to people who learned only negative or useless messages about money during childhood?