{hot~tea}
Bronze Member
Lately I've been contemplating sexual morality and what that means to me. I was raised in a pretty hardcore Baptist Church so any kind of "lust" outside of marriage was considered a big sin, which caused me to feel immense guilt over my body's need to masturbate. Years later, I grew out of Christianity and started exploring my sexuality in a new relationship with a man with much more sexual experience than me (which I was and am 100% okay with). Since then, I've done a lot of healing and growth and still have a pretty strong libido.
However, I have a really rough time with my partner watching porn. I could write on and on about the problems with the porn industry and all of the negative impacts it has on relationships, society, and especially young boys growing up with 24/7 access to porn on the internet. My partner and I have come to terms with "agree to disagree" on the subject, but I find myself falling into despair and depression whenever I suspect that he's been watching porn.
I am working really hard to heal, and the other night I realized that I really don't like the secrecy/ambiguity of when my partner watches porn. I thought about it and realized that it may be connected to my father's ambiguous sexual energy towards me when I was a child. There was a lot of intruding, spying on, disrupting boundaries, etc, but there was never any cold hard evidence of sexual intent. I think that's what him hiding/not communicating the activity takes me back to emotionally. But my partner says that he doesn't feel comfortable communicating that private part of his life to me.
What are your views on pornography? How have you cultivated a strong, healthy, and positive view on sexuality? How has this impacted your relationship with pornography/modern day sexuality? I'd love to hear everyone's experiences.
However, I have a really rough time with my partner watching porn. I could write on and on about the problems with the porn industry and all of the negative impacts it has on relationships, society, and especially young boys growing up with 24/7 access to porn on the internet. My partner and I have come to terms with "agree to disagree" on the subject, but I find myself falling into despair and depression whenever I suspect that he's been watching porn.
I am working really hard to heal, and the other night I realized that I really don't like the secrecy/ambiguity of when my partner watches porn. I thought about it and realized that it may be connected to my father's ambiguous sexual energy towards me when I was a child. There was a lot of intruding, spying on, disrupting boundaries, etc, but there was never any cold hard evidence of sexual intent. I think that's what him hiding/not communicating the activity takes me back to emotionally. But my partner says that he doesn't feel comfortable communicating that private part of his life to me.
What are your views on pornography? How have you cultivated a strong, healthy, and positive view on sexuality? How has this impacted your relationship with pornography/modern day sexuality? I'd love to hear everyone's experiences.