What is loneliness?

Roland

Confident
I’d say loneliness is a lack of connection. Being around people is often far lonelier than being alone. I’m not afraid to be alone, actually I enjoy being alone. But I am close to my family and my boyfriend, but I still feel lonely. I have often resigned that this is me, that I won’t ever not feel lonely. That it’s a result of being weird, being intelligent and creative. The result of ptsd and how you can’t talk about what you’ve been through and you don’t dare talk about how it’s always in your head replaying over and over. I don’t have friends, but do friends cure loneliness? Real friends, the kind that stick with you. I don’t know. What do you think of loneliness? What do you do to not feel lonely?
 

Friday

Moderator
What do you think of loneliness?
It’s being less than I can be.

And the pain of absence & desire… without opportunity, luck, willingness, allowance, patience, or spirit/strength/energy (that “oomph” that sees the spark, and chases it, blows it into flame).

It’s part of life.

How much of a part of life? I’m not sure. In the best of times there are still the crushing press of endless moments. In the worst of life it may be fleeting or abundant.

It’s that bizarre tecton plate where what one feels & what is… create friction.
 

Roland

Confident
It’s being less than I can be.

And the pain of absence & desire… without opportunity, luck, willingness, allowance, patience, or spirit/strength/energy (that “oomph” that sees the spark, and chases it, blows it into flame).

It’s part of life.

How much of a part of life? I’m not sure. In the best of times there are still the crushing press of endless moments. In the worst of life it may be fleeting or abundant.

It’s that bizarre tecton plate where what one feels & what is… create friction.
How do you identify what you’re missing out of all the things you listed?
 

arfie

MyPTSD Pro
I’d say loneliness is a lack of connection.

i wish i'd thought of that elegant simplicity first. i'll second that notion of loneliness as lack of connection. when i am alone, it is far easier for me to connect with critters, projects and what not. i seldom feel lonely when i am alone. people are most often a distraction from my easiest connections.

i find it much harder to connect with people, but finding a connection is my cure for the loneliness i feel in a crowd. i doesn't need to like the connection or want to take it home with me. i just need to connect, if only to make eye contact.
 

Roland

Confident
i wish i'd thought of that elegant simplicity first. i'll second that notion of loneliness as lack of connection. when i am alone, it is far easier for me to connect with critters, projects and what not. i seldom feel lonely when i am alone. people are most often a distraction from my easiest connections.

i find it much harder to connect with people, but finding a connection is my cure for the loneliness i feel in a crowd. i doesn't need to like the connection or want to take it home with me. i just need to connect, if only to make eye contact.
Makes perfect sense
 

PreciousChild

MyPTSD Pro
I like the definition that loneliness is a lack of connection. I wanted to add my experience with loneliness as being about something missing inside. I remember feeling really lonely soon after my divorce a dozen years ago, especially when I was around or even passed by a couple or family. Even before I met my current bf of 4 years, I began to stop feeling that pang of loneliness. I think it had a lot to do with healing. I don't know if this will make sense, but my loneliness felt like a kind of envy that others had what it took to love and be loveable and I was missing it.
 

Defaultxlove

MyPTSD Pro
I agree it's a missed connection of some sort. For me I check with God...then family/friends. If I'm lonely in a room of people I love and I know love me. Then I find I need something for me. Self care. I need me.

Beyond that...I'm lacking in relationships. Being alone with someone because of what they are doing is the worst kind of loneliness I've ever felt.
 

Roland

Confident
I like the definition that loneliness is a lack of connection. I wanted to add my experience with loneliness as being about something missing inside. I remember feeling really lonely soon after my divorce a dozen years ago, especially when I was around or even passed by a couple or family. Even before I met my current bf of 4 years, I began to stop feeling that pang of loneliness. I think it had a lot to do with healing. I don't know if this will make sense, but my loneliness felt like a kind of envy that others had what it took to love and be loveable and I was missing it.
Yeah that makes sense

I agree it's a missed connection of some sort. For me I check with God...then family/friends. If I'm lonely in a room of people I love and I know love me. Then I find I need something for me. Self care. I need me.

Beyond that...I'm lacking in relationships. Being alone with someone because of what they are doing is the worst kind of loneliness I've ever felt.
I agree with that, I lack friendships, but I am very spiritual, relationship with God, family, and my boyfriend, but that loneliness is kinda constant for me. So idk.
 
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