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What Is On Your Mind Right This Second?

How I loved human genetics. Now... I saw a news story and wish I worked for a wildlife sanctuary and washed off little oil covered ducks all day. I actually would be happy doing that, very happy actually. Wouldn't even be like work. Life is funny.
I am thinking about my younger day and how they got screwed up because no one came to rescue me from abuse like I had once hoped for. So I guess I have to eat that one "'cause it's too late baby, now it's too late." "Tho we really did try to make it..." singing 😃.
Aw @Lionheart Idk reading that ^^ if I should laugh or cry. (The song made me laugh). It's been quite a journey for you, that's an understatement of the century. I can only say I think you love deeply at least partly because you've suffered so deeply. Big hugs for you. 🫂

I think my unnerving feeling is partly the 'background noise' of negative news on tv and listening to co workers talking, and the subtle or not so subtle temptation to fall back in to overthinking, or the kind of thinking or distractions and self-focus that breed hopelessness for me, that is as close as I can describe it. So I'd rather not go that route. It's useless and actually inaccurate. It was funny, I saw a person the other day when I was feeling that unnerving feeling and fear with a T shirt that said, Love Always Wins. Then I saw them again, many miles away!
i woke up remembering what I need to remember, rather: plain gratitude; not fearing what is ok; not trying to solve what isn't for me to solve (that does not mean to despair); remember to not therefore get distracted from what I can do; go easier on myself if triggered. Forgot I had a guy follow me today. Wasn't worried, just unnerved, but I picked up on it right away. It started at the front of a grocery store and knew I could head straight for Customer service. I was just surprised how fast and persistent he was, didn't look like he was able.
Aw @Lionheart Idk reading that ^^ if I should laugh or cry. (The song made me laugh). It's been quite a journey for you, that's an understatement of the century. I can only say I think you love deeply at least partly because you've suffered so deeply. Big hugs for you. 🫂
Laugh, it is funny and I would rather you laugh than cry! And yes, it has been quite a journey for me. Thank you for being a part of my healing. Big Hugs for you as well!!! 🫂
The "incredibly" loud noise right outside my office door! Construction is everywhere around me. Across the street they are building a multi level warehouse and next door they are bringing in the equipment to pave the back parking lot. The street is lined with huge trucks - with engines roaring constantly. The side walk is about 20 feet from my door and they are parked on both sides of the street. The trucks have been going up and down the road multiple times since the road is a dead end, so they come and go, come and go.They are also replacing the main road at the end of our street, so the noise is coming from all directions. I would really like to be home right now - at least it would be quieter. I'm near tears now and will be here for another 7 hours!
Oh @katz I'm familiar with it, and worked in a building they added an addition to and it went on for nearly a year, the jack hammering for months. It rattles your teeth and my nerves felt shot! No wonder these poor workers lose their hearing. TLC and my sympathies to you!! And your ears!! 🫂🫂🫂
I was thinking of someone I know who said, ~as humans we are egocentric; we think or make everything about us. But it rarely is.

Unrelated, I was also thinking of whether my choices or presence is negative, positive or neutral (incidental) for those around me. I know it's important not to overthink, but I do imagine it's also important to think. But, I don't really know. my opinion or conclusion might be different from their's. Only matters to the extent I can alter whether I'm there or not, of course.

But, I'm also too tired to wonder about what Idk. I like not overthinking, but I hope that's not a mistake.
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I woke up thinking of my sister and remembering it's important to be there to give support; that it's important to do in general. Regardless of what my brain wonders at times (above).
@Freddyt! Sorry to bother you but you were the person (knowing cats) who came to mind! (Although any Cat people's advice is appreciated!!) I came home tonight-motion detector was on in the back and dog away- opened the back door to check garage and there was a (large) black cat sitting about 10 feet away. Went to grab my phone (camera) and to the right came another.. and then a third! 1st one went to leave and then turned around and walked slowly to me (I stayed inside). NOT kittens- LARGE!! Know it is 'mice looking for shelter season', but haven't seen any. Large fence all the way around... What is THAT??? I like cats and worry about black ones at Halloween but did not know if these were feral? Sister saw a black one a few days ago and it ran towards her and the dog- she walked away and had bad feeling as it wasn't keeping a distance. What do you think?? We are in the city and in Canada too.
Thank you!!
Signed, Clueless about cats! 🫥👀

ETA @Freddyt , I just talked to a friend- said maybe domesticated, got out and stuck together, she thought weird it came to me though. But said they eat bunnies!! And I just said to my sister no sign of the 1-3 of them (bunnies) that I usually see in the yard! (??) 👀 She said even as a cat person that would freak her out! (?)

(And to add to it there are fairy lights in an old glass oil lamp and they were on. in the house. 👀 🤣 )
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