What would you do? Has anyone else experienced anything like this at work due to their diagnosis?

JRRTG

Learning
So I have been in my job a fair while 6+ years. I’m good at it. It’s intense, I work on the front line and with a lot of conflict. I’ve never had any complaints, no performance reviews, no disciplinary, great feedback when I had an assessor.
However, our workloads are astonishingly high, way about 100%. Most of struggling. I’ve never complained about this, I’ve just got on with my work, my boss even called me low maintenance. I started to put in way more hours than I should, and well it become exhausting.
i finally plucked up the courage to tell my boss that I’m burnt out, I’m drained and am struggling with workloads. This is the first time I’ve ever brought it up.
now, ordinarily I have a good relationship with him. He is aware of my diagnosis etc etc. Occupational health reports further evidence that my issues don’t impact my work and I actually over work not under perform. That was that. As a result of telling my boss of my struggles he proceeds to tell me that he thinks May due to my diagnosis, this may not be the job for me, as well as being a single mother. Now, This threw me and really got to me. Has anyone else experienced anything like this at work due to their diagnosis? I took two weeks holiday leave to think about it all, and I honestly don’t want to go back, but feel if I don’t go back, it’s just more fuel for my boss to say the job isn’t for me. In my opinion it isn’t the job, it’s the workloads and pressures currently
 

LittleBigFoot

MyPTSD Pro
I don’t have good advice, but I’m so sorry. I hate how our economy/workplaces are structured like this. There’s such a lack of understanding and empathy for any kind of mental health. And I’m not just referring to when someone has an actual diagnosis, I’m talking just everyone average Joes brain. The overworking that happens in so many industries is so damaging. I get why it happens demand/money/lack of workforce in US at the moment. But we have such a crappy system for anyone to develop a healthy work/life balance.
 

Movingforward10

MyPTSD Pro
Sorry that happened to you. Which country are you in? In the UK there would be room (if you felt able) to take this to HR or a union or something, as that is descriminatory behaviour from the manager.

In the meantime, do you feel able to challenge what he said and ask why he said it? And get him to explain himself rather than you explain yourself?
 

Friday

Moderator
Has anyone else experienced anything like this at work due to their diagnosis?
Yes & No.

No… I’ve never told any employer about my dx.

Yes… I’ve certainly had bosses in veeeeeery different beadspaces than I am in, and “deciding” that XYZ is why I disagree with their assessment of the situation. When, maybe that’s why I am. But maybe not, at all, they’re just looking for a reason to blow off why I disagree with them.

Disagreeing with a boss is problematic.

Maybe they’re right.

Maybe I’m right.

- If I’m certain they’re wrong? I work around them. And do NOT take them to heart.
- If I’m uncertain who is right? I do what you’ve done & take some space to prepare myself/ get right with myself.
- If I’m disappointed in them? Ditto.
- If I’m certain they’re right, doesn’t apply, as you aren’t. For good reason. Like 6 years of experience in the same job, means this isn’t my fitness for the job that is causing the disagreement. So their read is wrong, full stop. Which takes us back to options 1-3. They’re wrong, or I’m uncertain, or I’m disappointed in them.
 

Skywatcher

MyPTSD Pro
I own my own business and do contract work. My husband says it is because I can’t handle working for someone else. This is true—very much related to my ptsd stuff. Back when I was an employee I had some bad troubles with certain bosses. Looking back now, I had ptsd then, but I was in my twenties and didn’t know what it was. I never brought up mental issues for that reason. If I had, I’m pretty sure they might have said the same thing. People want things to be easy. Mental issues complicate things, your boss is probably thinking that you can be replaced. The fact that you were doing a great job doesn’t matter. If you are being over worked in the situation and he isn’t willing to make changes to accommodate you, maybe a different scene would be better for you. You can start fresh and line up your boundaries and expectations in the new job before you begin.
 

onlyashadow

New Here
I joined just to answer this.
What your boss is doing is discrimination and harassment and IT'S AGAINST THE LAW. Contact you HR dept and or a lawyer. Any retaliation or hint of it from your boss is AGAINST THE LAW. Keep a record of all that is said by your boss. Keep your HR and or a lawyer informed of ALL that is said. When you contact your HR and or a lawyer tell them what you said in you post.
YOU HAVE RIGHTS!!!
 
In the USA this might not be against the law.

Depending on the business, accommodations for PTSD may be required if asked for. But most small businesses don't have to give accommodations.

Keep in mind that HR protects the company, not you.
 

enough

MyPTSD Pro
Keep in mind that HR protects the company, not you.
and there you have it. If you can talk to your boss about what he could do to help you, he can and probably will go to his to see what they can do to help him, and if he wants a new employee to fill your spot, he isn't telling them you are low maintenance any more. Not say ing you made a mistake to at least try for the easiest fix of the situation in hopes that he was also looking to make you a happy and productive worker in a better space. Just saying that it is out there now and you could expect to see and hear more of the same if this is how he is going to play it.

Myself? If I find myself in a bad work environment, thats 1 problem. Talking about it and making it known is possibly not a problem, possibly a solution, but also possibly another problem because now you know that the boss knows about it and lets it slide. That makes 2 problems. If they react in a way that makes it worse, thats 3 problems to deal with. Remember the good old days when you only had the 1 problem? i do, because I tried to make it better by talking to my boss. Never worked, but if it helps and gives you hope I can tell you that they have all been fired, right down the line. All for something else, but fired. I work in an engineering type role, designing stuff that keeps a big factory churning. My bosses have all been very poor engineers that didn't get much respect from anyone, or superlative engineers that wouldn't know what to do with respect if they had it because their people skills were poor. I try to keep a smile on my face and work in front of me and do that as much as possible including late nights and lots of OT when it is available. There has been more conflict this past year because we are all thrown out of our rhythms and some of us survive by the beat of that rhythm, sounds to me like you are one too, respectfully. Hope this helps a little
 

grit

MyPTSD Pro
Now, This threw me and really got to me. Has anyone else experienced anything like this at work due to their diagnosis? I took two weeks holiday leave to think about it all, and I honestly don’t want to go back, but feel if I don’t go back, it’s just more fuel for my boss to say the job isn’t for me. In my opinion it isn’t the job, it’s the workloads and pressures currently
There are few issues as far as I can see from this quote:
You are worried rightfully so.
You are probably being discriminated depending where you are in the world.
You took good enough time to think over the issue and the situation.
You came to the conclusion you do not want to work there anymore but you want to prove something to them.
Whether it is the job or the workload is subjective and can be argued about.

I do not know if you are asking advice or not but without obviously having all the information, I would say stay on the job but look for something else.
6+ years is a long time and you must have a lot more info about the culture but it seems like this person is not supportive or even a good manager. I am sorry you are in this situation but be strategic rather than reactive.
 
D

Deleted member 50877

So I have been in my job a fair while 6+ years. I’m good at it. It’s intense, I work on the front line and with a lot of conflict. I’ve never had any complaints, no performance reviews, no disciplinary, great feedback when I had an assessor.
However, our workloads are astonishingly high, way about 100%. Most of struggling. I’ve never complained about this, I’ve just got on with my work, my boss even called me low maintenance. I started to put in way more hours than I should, and well it become exhausting.
i finally plucked up the courage to tell my boss that I’m burnt out, I’m drained and am struggling with workloads. This is the first time I’ve ever brought it up.
now, ordinarily I have a good relationship with him. He is aware of my diagnosis etc etc. Occupational health reports further evidence that my issues don’t impact my work and I actually over work not under perform. That was that. As a result of telling my boss of my struggles he proceeds to tell me that he thinks May due to my diagnosis, this may not be the job for me, as well as being a single mother. Now, This threw me and really got to me. Has anyone else experienced anything like this at work due to their diagnosis? I took two weeks holiday leave to think about it all, and I honestly don’t want to go back, but feel if I don’t go back, it’s just more fuel for my boss to say the job isn’t for me. In my opinion it isn’t the job, it’s the workloads and pressures currently

So sorry this had happened to you. And the thing I am sorry the most is that you believe that this is because of your diagnosis. Because it‘s not. Burnout is real and can happen to anyone at any time. It‘s about workload. And while everyone has some predispositions, such as low stress treshhold or not being very good in organization, you have proved in the past that you do your work amazingly well.

When it comes to diagnosis, my thought is this: you having a diagnosis six years ago doesn‘t tell anything at all about you having it now. There is a huge assumption and a lot of false judgment on the side of your boss. I also see this as discrimination and inacceptable behavior: you set boundaries and you did rightly so and they picked two personal things about you (diagnosis and your personal situation) and disvalidated your feedback. What‘s more, after 6 years they claim this job not being for you? It makes no sense and I can‘t even imagine how hurtful this must have been. I see how you don‘t want to go back. Thinking about it, your boss should be glad that you brought this up because there are employees, who silently suffer and get sick notes more and more often, make more and more mistakes and start having conflict with others as a result of too much workload. You took it professionally and said what was going on instead. That‘s a very confident thing.

Not sure what I would do. But I so wish you would see this separate from any diagnosis because it has nothing to do with that.
 
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