Justmehere
Sponsor
I keep experiencing panic/anger/frustration as very similar sensations and symptoms.
Frustration to me can be kept manageable with a few cognitive reminders, adhd meds (because I have well tested adhd), and what I'll call an, "oh well" statement. Or focusing on what I value more - people, flexibly, etc. so "oh well" about the other stuff.
Right now a few things are deeply spooking me. Trauma triggers and stressors.
The pattern is that I say no, someone pushes.... then I will feel ordinary frustration, or annoyance, hold the boundary, the other person will get angry, and snap, my my heart races...
If I can keep it at mild panic, but holding my ground and walking away, I'm good. I can knock down or ride out any feelings and carry on.
But when it's my heart races and I feel... it feels like fear but it's more tense... it's anger or even just a sensation of my heart racing and frustration.., then I implode on myself. Not at anyone else but just undone inside of me. I'll own that I rage at myself.
I keep thinking about the moment my heart races and it flips from fear or slight panic to this fear fueled frustration or anger. I think I'm trying to find control. Panic feels helpless and scary and ick, but anger is a nightmare of its own. I dump it all at myself and I can't seem to undo that part of it. I can't convince myself right now to stop letting my thoughts and actions run amuck with self hate... and penalizing behaviors... I'm trying but not winning that battle. I think I need to head it off at the pass.
I keep wondering if there is a way to shift to flight and less to fight?
Anyone else feel anger and fear in similar ways?
Frustration to me can be kept manageable with a few cognitive reminders, adhd meds (because I have well tested adhd), and what I'll call an, "oh well" statement. Or focusing on what I value more - people, flexibly, etc. so "oh well" about the other stuff.
Right now a few things are deeply spooking me. Trauma triggers and stressors.
The pattern is that I say no, someone pushes.... then I will feel ordinary frustration, or annoyance, hold the boundary, the other person will get angry, and snap, my my heart races...
If I can keep it at mild panic, but holding my ground and walking away, I'm good. I can knock down or ride out any feelings and carry on.
But when it's my heart races and I feel... it feels like fear but it's more tense... it's anger or even just a sensation of my heart racing and frustration.., then I implode on myself. Not at anyone else but just undone inside of me. I'll own that I rage at myself.
I keep thinking about the moment my heart races and it flips from fear or slight panic to this fear fueled frustration or anger. I think I'm trying to find control. Panic feels helpless and scary and ick, but anger is a nightmare of its own. I dump it all at myself and I can't seem to undo that part of it. I can't convince myself right now to stop letting my thoughts and actions run amuck with self hate... and penalizing behaviors... I'm trying but not winning that battle. I think I need to head it off at the pass.
I keep wondering if there is a way to shift to flight and less to fight?
Anyone else feel anger and fear in similar ways?