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Worried about Depression and Job

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whiteraven

MyPTSD Pro
I got a new job in August of 2020 after leaving a job of 16 years in March. It's a pretty good job, and now I am able to work primarily from home. Sometimes I don't have a lot to do, but I am only one of two in my position, so the other woman can take off when she needs to, and I cover for her. The work I do have I do quickly and I don't miss much.

That said, I'm starting to worry about job stability. I work for a temporary service, although the company I'm assigned to hires probably more temps than permanent employees, so there are a lot of us there. And many have been there for 5 years or more. I do think I am useful, even though I don't always have work, but the woman who works with me did the job by herself for a couple of years before I arrived.

But the instability based on the temporary position is not really what I'm most concerned about. I have gotten to the point where I don't care about the work. I mean, I never really cared about work for a large corporation, but this is more like,...it feels wrong and unimportant and stupid. I've come to see that how we do things in this world is backward and exploitive and so many other things that I just can't describe. So, I worked in my last job while hating it, but I'm afraid I'm not going to be able to do that here. I'm starting to just not care about anything at work. It all feels pointless, and I don'to want to do any of it. Quitting is not an option; I know I would feel this way at any job that is just a job. If that makes sense.

Just needed someone to hear. I'm having a hard time right now. Thanks.
 
I don't want to do any of it. Quitting is not an option; I know I would feel this way at any job that is just a job.

I am living this too. Just navigated a severe depression and now work is a place I am obligated to show up. I go but I am not really present. I keep getting assigned new challenging projects that are above my pay grade. And I just keep trucking doing what I was hired to do. I feel it’s just a matter of time but it’s really hard to give a rats patootie about just another job.
 
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Well, listen to this. I got an email a couple of days ago that was a "Kudos," which the temp agency I work for supports for their employees. My supervisor--who is with the company I'm assigned to--wrote up a "Kudos" for me, saying lots of really good stuff, including that they were glad to have me and my expertise on the team. It was a really nice surprise.
 
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