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You Know Your Paranoid When...

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Neverthesame

MyPTSD Pro
You come home a late shift, almost trip over a mysterious package some dickhead has thrown over your fence. Immediately go inside, don your flack jacket, torch and knife. Go outside and ensure that it really is just a piece of trash, and not something worse. (turned out to be a dirty diaper.)

That's pretty f*cking gross, but not dangerous, I don't know what I was expecting. I'm not even a combat vet, or a peacetime vet for that matter.

Anyone else go overboard about silly stuff like this?

Mind you, this is the first time I've had anything like this lobbed over my fence, but still...

Least I didn't wear my helmet... Lol only during hail storms.

Hope the kid that soiled it doesn't have dysentery or something. Sigh... It's been a long day.
 
Yes. Used to do this all the time. I still need reassurances from people that things are not 'as big' as I think they are. Anything out of place....doors open or things out of place in a house freak me out. I don't notice so much outside of the house, but inside....man oh man....
 
Whew. I'm glad I'm not the only one. The only kind of weird thing is that garbage collection day for my street was Friday morning. Where did they find it?

I can't see any of my neighbours doing that. No reason to, I don't think. I don't know anything I do that would be irritating. No parties, loud music, overgrown yard, weeds, old furniture, appliances, cars on cinder blocks, or pets laying around. I even shovel my walk in winter, despite the fact that I get at least one case of frostnip every year.

So it must have been some kid, lobbing it over because he thought it was funny....

Ok now I am way over thinking this. Lol. Damnit.
 
You're seriously cranky when it's calm after the storm. (The before one is handleable. That's spent in preparation.)

The more you mean, the blurrier you get.

The more you want to say on anything, the less you do.
 
@shimmerz, try the opposite one. 'Why am I completely safe'.

It may be a difficult one to think & then usual hypervig may jump in and jack your thinking in unexpected directions anyway, but you may be able to come down the paranoia edge; finding you're not completely safe (and who is, ever) but how deep something is messing with you, isn't how dangerous it is.
 
Well...

Another late shift done... Another diaper.
Really? Seriously what the f*ck?

I hate it when I am being paranoid, I really f*cking hate it when I'm not. Do I seriously have to camp out in the f*cking yard now?

Shit like this makes me wonder if I really have anger problems. For f*cks sakes. The f*ck did I do?
 
Someone tells you you're a wonderful person.

Clearly, they're saying goodbye, and will be dead before you can do anything about it.

:facepalm:

Unless they are.

:banghead:

...but wait... Stop. Just stop... But if...Dammit!



***
I need Icecream. Or maybe Xanax & a blankie. A serious lay. Something. :cautious::shifty::bag::wtf:
I'm going to bed.
Wake me up at the apocalypse.
The world is ending in a ball of flame.
Or maybe mush. Something. And it won't be pleasant.
This is what you get for being happy.
 
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I have a post in here somewhere about a cigarette at the front door (in my ashtray), that wasn't my cigarette. Sent me to the MOON! It's a long story as to why I was jacked up with this.

The people on the board talked me down from it - gave me perspectives that changed my immediate rush of 'oh f*ck, they found me'. Was I paranoid? Not given my past. Was it realistic that they found me? Yes. They had found me many times before. So is that paranoid? Nope. But did I want to live like that? Nope.

Some people are just freaking idiots who have nothing better to do than to play with people. I wonder if you could externalize so that you are focusing on what a moron the person doing this is - picture them getting shit on their face when they fling the diaper next time or something. Change the picture in your mind to make the perp the one with problems rather than yourself. Just thinking out loud here.
 
I was told you know you're paranoid when you go to a football game (American football anyway) the team goes into a huddle and you think they're talking about you. :banghead:
why would they do that?' 'who would have done that?' 'what did I do for them to target me?' and so on and so on and so on.
sooooooooo, are you saying that's not "what everyone does"? 'cause it seems pretty normal to me. :wideeyed:
 
You're upset when nobody's talking about you, because c'mon does it mean you're all too fed up with me and plotting something else already? :facepalm::banghead:

When in general it's the absence of something that gets to you, not the presence of something. Holes as a favorite real & metaphysical phobia.
 
@shimmerz, as thinking about 'shit, been found', I found recently something I went by for ages is still useful -

Turn it around. 'They' reduced to one single prick in your way. You can deal with one person. You can best one person.

Eventually, you can go with 'Darned insult. Sending me just ONE person. I'm better than that.' There's another thing: If they found you, in your home? You still have a chance you know your home better than them. It's your lair, not their. So use what you know, what they likely don't.

Starting with being offended can lead to anger responses, and anger responses can be good for defense.

(Or not freezing, at least. Totally depends what type of response it is, and how it's checked.)
 
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