its a sunny day no too hot had a walk down the road sat on a bench lit a cigarette and , zap, zoned out completely, wasnt even aware that a friend of mine was stood there waving in front of me asking if anybody was in, dang thing just snuck up on me no warning no nothing, just beep end of transmission no one home please call back later, realised my finger was hot as the cigarette i had lit had burned down and my mate was looking a bit confused, managed to stand up and wander back, mind is fragged but, why do these things sneak up, is it that i was just relaxed nothing going on enjoying a nice day? damn brain thinks if im relaxed and not stressed then somethings about to jump out and bite so it switches off, spent so much time dealing with stuff that when i relax brain thinks something is going to come along and stuff things up, dang brain, got so bad at one point that i was just sat there for days not aware of anything just the odd bout of shakes , living in the mind where everything around is unreal, time space reality all seem far away, dang thing snuck up on me today. dang keep an eye on it and then try and keep a grasp of things around is the trick i find to get back again,