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Hey everyone. It's been awhile since I've logged on, and I think it's catching up to me. Ive had more flashbacks than usual--pretty much every day--and they are more often than not triggered by sex. I have a lovely boyfriend who knows about my PTSD, who would never hurt me and is pretty mindful...
On Saturday, I almost killed myself--I was crazy drunk and pill-high and I cut myself deeper than I ever have before. Before that night, I had been doing such a good job taking care of myself and my suicidal ideation. But I knew I couldn't just wash my face and jump in bed and wait to deal until...
Thank you for sharing a bit of what you're going through! :) I really think I should learn to view it as liberating and allowing me as opposed to attention-seeking or victimy in any way. I hope all goes well for you, and please feel free to message me any time! :hug:
This is so encouraging! I...
Hi everyone. I've been having a pretty hard time lately symptom-wise: lots of flashbacks, panic attacks, dissociation, suicidal ideation etc. I'm working now with my team to stay in school and stop drinking/SH-ing and other destructive behaviors, but I'm leaving for college in the fall--and I'm...
Thank you, @joeylittle and @ghotiff . I do feel like I would be much less ashamed (and more open to talking about my trauma with her) if she had told me immediately that I wasn't responsible for any of it. I brought it up with her at our last session, and she apologized profusely for not making...
This is so relieving to hear. It really does make me feel less ashamed knowing it wasn't my fault I did those things, and those things happened to me. Thank you for being so honest and caring. I'm beyond grateful.
I think it's also my fault for not telling her it was trafficking in the first place. Two years ago, I didn't present it as a trauma. Still, I know you're right: she should have told me it was manipulative and coercive even if I didn't know it was (or didn't believe it to be). Thank you for...
Thank you, so much. It's been difficult to hate him, because I really did feel safer with him than I did with my parents or anyone else. Still, I know he really didn't care about me at all, and hearing people say things like this to me help me remember that. Thank you.
I think I should rephrase--she said I allowed myself to be put in a situation where I would be abused/traumatized by him, by getting in his car the first day. But you're right--it was probably more damaging of her to say that than helpful in any way.
Thank you for this. She has worked with...
Thank you! I'm 18, but I've been working with him since I was younger. He's very very clever, I think. And I definitely think it would be better to try something that could "slow me down" over SNRIs--if nothing else, for the withdrawals!
Thank you. I really appreciate all the support I've...
Thank you. I am so grateful for all of this. It's hard to say I was trafficked, but it helps knowing that I didn't have to be miserable all the time. My experience is so different from what is shown on tv, but I know that doesn't mean it was okay. Thank you.
This is so helpful. I'm having a really hard time attributing this to my own situation, partly because I think I didn't know at the time how exploitative it was. Thank you for responding so thoughtfully, and for reaffirming
my trauma (does that make sense? It helps when someone else validates...
Thank you. She does have experience working with sex workers (because she has her LCSW), but I think she calls me that becausewhen I first disclosed this to her, I called myself a prostitute, because I didn't want to label myself as a victim. This was almost two years ago, but it clearly still...