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Recent content by Ruining

  1. R

    Sufferer PTSD from childhood trauma, working in a prison, and cleaning up nephew’s suicide.

    Thank you for the reply. I’m sure you’re right, and I’ll keep checking in here and reading the forums. I’m at a point where I don’t think I’ve ever been ‘happy.’ That’s likely the cloud I’m under right now. I’ve been through a lot in my life, but it’s always paid off in some way. This, though...
  2. R

    Undiagnosed Hi everyone! come read my life story, I spent more than 2 hours finegraining this post ^_^'

    Welcome to the site. I’ve only just found it myself, and I hope you find some relief here. I’m glad you’re drawing boundaries, and I was happy to find that you’re in a relationship with someone you’ve known for so long. It’s much more likely you know the ‘real him,’ as it’s very difficult to...
  3. R

    Sufferer PTSD from childhood trauma, working in a prison, and cleaning up nephew’s suicide.

    Thank you for the reply. I haven’t been keeping him in the steel box, but more like a cradle, nursing the memory of cleaning his blood and brain and chunks of eyeball. I keep that memory close because as I age my memory is going. And I need something to hold onto. And I need to let go, but I’m...
  4. R

    Sufferer PTSD from childhood trauma, working in a prison, and cleaning up nephew’s suicide.

    I tried looking for “rules” before posting. I’ll try not to get too detailed or gruesome. But I’m so badly affected by my nephew’s suicide, I seem to be the only one who’s left with this amount of suffering. I worked in a prison for six years, and I had the 24 hours of hyper-vigilance and...
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