Recent content by Sami - sadwife

Thanks, @Sighs . I did look at it a little, but the military training component does not apply for my husband. His PTSD derives from his time as a political activist in the middle of a revolution as well as his time working with Doctors Without Borders in an active war zone. No military training...

Thanks joeylittle! That really is a helpful perspective. And possibly even an optimistic one. Sounds like you're saying your relationship is the thing that feels secure--dare I even say "safe"--to you. At least that could be something I could hold onto as a talisman.

So I've been here a few days and already I've learned so much. But I have a question: why can't I, your wife, be in your stress cup? Like I get the concept: there's a finite amount of stress a sufferer can handle and any spillover has negative consequences. But it gets me thinking: isn't there...

How do you expect me to be happy and supportive when you give me no rope, no patience, when you snap at me for every stupid little thing ever? I'm trying really hard not to just shut down on you, but it's not easy. You're mean to me and I'm supposed to sit back and be patient with you and not be...

Never says the words "I'm sorry". Makes me flippin crazy. Can't convince him how powerfully diffusing those two words would be for me. Not only is he never wrong, but the few times he admits he is, he makes excuses. And something tells me he thinks those excuses are an apology. They are not. My...

Yes, yes, a thousand times yes.

Thanks. I probably need to talk about marriage counseling.

It's so funny of you to say: I always tell my husband the exact same thing, that he's more evolved than the average person. And yes, when people meet him they either love him or hate him. There's no middle ground. And he has little patience for typical social structures and expectations. The...

Thank you. Your comments are really very helpful. I've been thinking about marriage counseling for a little while now but didn't really know how to approach it. Doesn't help that he doesn't have a therapist right now. And I'm also not sure if insurance covers marriage counseling. I honestly...

He is indeed in treatment. Or he was, when he was going to school in another state. Now that he's back home, he's having a hard time finding another good therapist who's covered by our insurance and is trained in CBT and ESRD. He was seeing two before, and now none. And I guess I get upset...

I knew I'd need to clarify this when I said it. I know well that you can't change a person when you marry them. I was referring more to the fact that you can tell a person that you feel their actions are hurtful and that they upset you. And then you can hope that they will work to adjust those...

Hey guys, I just joined. I've been struggling a lot lately because I basically just realized that everything I hate about my husband can be attributed to his PTSD. And I'm feeling hopeless because of it. Let me backtrack: On our first date, my husband told me he had PTSD. So that's all I ever...