Recent content by yes

I am in the same boat. He was outside my home on last Thursday just to wave his new woman in my face. All I want is to forget him. I want him out of my head. I suffered sexual abuse too among other things. It must end one day.:(

Can you help me to understand well the reasons why he does that? Why is it so important to him to destroy me? He has already succeeded in that.

I just cannot accept such a cruelty. Why. Why

I have got CPTSD after an abusive relationship. I have been No Contact fro 46 days now. Until now I thought I was being "ghosted" as he never reached out. I have been trying my best to recover. I have no evidence of my abuse which was emotional but not only emotional. I am currently trying EMDR...

Thank you all for your beautiful replies. I will try.

Thank you Gadgie. I wish this for you for sure. I hope you will find someone. I find it impossible to believe it for myself.

My abuser has been my last try . I trusted him enough to give him my heart after many years alone. And here I am. 48 yrsold and so damaged. It is sad to think I will always be alone. That I was doomed to be alone. It is sad. Everything around me is sad. I am so fed up of crying.

Yes Boag I am seeing a therapist. I am in the process of starting EMDR.

Yesterday I was very triggered and today I am in a lot of emotional pain. My flashbacks are just pain. I can feel it in a lump between my throat and my chest. It is so strong it leaves me exhausted and unable to move. It canlast days. I am so exhausted. It is beyond any words. All I Can do to...

It is just that.....even if I will be able one day to but some flowers...they are linked to him. Maybe cyclamens are not. I will try with some cyclamens as they are due soon. I just want him out of my head. How I wish I never ever met him. So triggered today. Lots of flashbacks. It hurts so much.

I needed this. Thank you so much :hug:

In the same boat. All he gave me is CPTSD. I have been no contact for 45 days now. My therapist who is a very balanced person uses words like violence, abuse, gang type abuse. It is what he is. I miss stupid things. His face. But my home is peaceful without him. My life is peaceful. He does not...

Thank you shecat. I will try.

Thank you Casey. I wish so much to be able to look at flowers and not think of him. I am suffering a lot. I lost not only this. I Lost my peace. I lost my strength and I lost myself and the joy of simple life. I lost many things. I want them back.

My abuser is a biologyst. He loved so much flowers and plants and animals (funny,huh?). Well the problem is that flowers and plants are such a trigger for me. But I want to be free to have flowers.....It feels like I have been robbed of a joy. And it is true. How do I deal with that?:(