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Hi intrepid...no winning an argument with him at all...made worse that he argues for a living (he's a judge). He refused to consider getting any help, as he doesn't think he's doing anything wrong, in fact it was described as though it was a good thing...

Yikes, "emotionally venomous"...that's a good one. Do you think that's really that bad? (genuine question - am not being facetious or flippant).

Hi, According to my T, I and my siblings were physically and emotionally abused when we were kids. I thought last year I could separate all of this as "ancient history" and no longer relevant to my current relationship with my parents which improved substantially after I left for University at...

Ironically, it's the thought and promise of death...yes, I'm morbid. Sorry. I have pretty much chronic major depression, and the last 12 months, it kind of looked like this: - Major depressive episode early last year, leading to time off work for 3 weeks; - Suicidal and tying rope to the...

Hi, Yep. Few years back I came to reconcile myself to not having real relationships; but I still got lonely and wanted some form of intimacy, even if it's really just "pretend" - wasn't so much interested in the sex, but rather the bit afterwards of closeness and sharing a bed. I don't do this...

hi @Fadeaway ( sorry, for some reason i wrote someone else?!) This is something I really struggle with, with my T - as he is (I think) trying to do the somatic experiencing stuff on me. It's a real struggle as as soon as he asks the question "what are you feeling and where"; my mind goes blank...

Hey everyone... Ok, I'll warn in advance, I'm likely not going to be able to explain this well... Hit a bit of a roadblock in seeing my T, basically because it's a question of: - He wants me to trust him, over trusting my "inner dialogue"/which is obviously me. Basically, there's a not so...

@Tigergirl1217 so sorry to hear of what you went through, that's horrendous. I had a minor experience of frightening medical experience when I was about 6/7 - I had a tonsillectomy, and even though they gave me some banana flavoured medicine that would make me go to sleep, I woke up on the...

Not religious myself, so don't pray, but certainly "wish" for similar...to just not wake up; to get hit by a bus. It makes me upset when "good people" die out of freak accidents, or illness...I'm left thinking, why couldn't that happen to me instead, as I have no value, whereas these other...

I'm in my thirties now, I tell my daughter I love her regularly, and vice versa. My parents never said those words until after I had left home, and that was only after I coaxed it out of them through humour. Maybe it's just a "British" thing and/or a generational thing e.g. I think nowadays...

Hi @Lucycat - yep, am familiar with the ACE study...pretty sobering stuff. Things like the ACE study provide a completely different viewpoint to behaviour that likely overlaps materially with behaviour that is often described as "mental illness". Part of me wants to grab the psychologists and...

Hi all, This is something I question a lot and I'd like to understand people's feedback. What I imagine we have in common in this forum is "adverse experience" of multiple varieties. I think most people recognise such experiences leave their mark on people. However - do you consider these...

Hi - this is more a bit of a vent/rant thing...not really something with a "question" I'm looking to people to answer...I just wanted to write it down in a sense. I don't dream very often...once or twice a year...if that...but all my dreams revolve around violence, typically sexual based, and...

Once upon a time, there was a boss he got upset and extremely cross he couldn’t control one of his minions the bitch thought she could have her own opinions! He manages people, can’t be seen to lose face so he started to think how to put her back in her place “I could make her comply -...

oh, and @Flossy - re: analytical minds...this is one of the things we mainly discuss - and to be fair I think he may be onto something... - I get upset because something happens; - I shut down the feelings and emotions; - Retreat into my head, and intellectualise everything; - My analytical...

Really great replies here, thank you so much everyone. @Fadeaway - I'm in Sydney, and seeing the T privately, so there's nothing mandating him to assign a diagnosis. So a bit different from the U.S. @Flossy and @SabrinaB - I really appreciate your feedback. Yeah, it does seem quite...

Hi @imok - thanks for replying. My t is a clinical psychologist, so I imagine he'd be qualified to give a diagnosis...otherwise, why would he have a copy of DSM IV on his bookshelf... I've been seeing him since February, which I appreciate isn't a very long time, but I would say he has a...

Hey @ghotiff - bit similar, I think there's clearly things "wrong" with me - unless everyone else spends their time contemplating their own demise...(no? thought not...). I've always assumed this is just "me" and my personality/character; other messages have been that I have a "broken-brain"...

ah... yeah somewhat vague of me - sorry everyone. I guess I'm looking for a "diagnosis" in the first instance, and then to understand the "why" behind whatever diagnosis e.g. biological; childhood(?); or is it me thinking the wrong/distorted way? sorry for not explaining better

Hi all, My T essentially refuses to tell me "what is wrong with" me. He does this because I think he's concerned that it's "rumination" and will lead to me internally beating myself up. Maybe this is partly true, but part of me genuinely wants to know why I get so depressed. I want to know...

Hi Chava, Can totally relate to the "rage" and "anger" being more frightening that actual physical acts...imagination of what could happen is always worse, as there are no limits. What used to frighten me the most what the sound of my dad screaming; the tone in his voice; the look in his eyes...

@Chava - yeah sorry, was typing too fast back...funny you're somewhere in America, and I'm in Sydney... I think I'll take a break from seeing this T for a bit, see how I "feel" (hahah) about that. Maybe this stuff just isn't for me. Or maybe I'll try to find someone else who is less focussed on...

Hey @Chava - thanks for your note. I've told him that, I explained that when he keeps pushing me to answer something that I don't know the answer to, I just feel like an idiot and that it makes me panic because I'm "getting it wrong" and "don't know". One of the things that prompted me to send...

@itsKismet - I do "feel" some things. Like the constant thinking in my head that is literally like a bad film on "repeat" for months; that I flinch when someone touches me; that I feel like I'm constantly on the verge of having a heart-attack and cannot breathe; that I jump and gasp when a noise...

Bah, sorry, rude of me, I meant to also include in the above, a thank you to everyone who replied, and I really appreciate the message of this not being unique to me... thank you.