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I saw myself possibly smiling at the guy in mirror. Hope.

Just a story. Not me seeking help or advisement. Just a story of nieghbor that if you had followed along this far may get some "entertainment" from. They had retired from Arizona to little town Northern Illinois. Very much against the normal migration routes. Early on they found friendship...

1. I "knew" the proof. That was there was nothing of note or needing immediate attention. 2. He triggered me and I assumed I "didn't know". Both. Both equally. I don't know that I can escape the feeling of both. At least not yet. For now I am looking to minimize the self destructive...

Our responses were minutes apart. That's some good stuff. Thanks. The world is slightly less lonely.

Real time brainstorming. Old man nieghbor knew I was looking for solutions. He just wants something to bitch about. By refusing to give me any reasonable options(remove dogs) to help with his complaints he didn't allow me the option to "fawn" him. Also while doing that he "happened" to bring...

I had to look up fawning. Seems equally accurate as it is offensive. Is there a different way I can word things to make it seem like something else? 😉

OFF

Since posting this and reading responses I have done a little "soul searching" I did have an emotionally abusive mother. Crafty lady in manipulation. I still don't know why I canvassed nieghborhood. I don't know exactly why I don't even go out to my mailbox in daylight anymore. However I...

Saying something to family, friends, or yourself can sometimes come off as protective. No matter how well meaning or thought out there is a layer of protection. Therapy with a strange professional has a way of removing the layer of protection. It is all the same and all different. I hope...

I have found myself in life asking/begging for validation of the weirdest stuff(my behaviors/feelings) The weirder it is the tougher time I have validating. My weird is normal to most. I get mostly the validation one would expect. Somehow this "weird" is me looking for something else. Most...

I believe it is necessary. At least for now. First off I don't think I will be able to flip switch automatically. I think the strategy does cause distress and disfunction because it runs parallel to real life and how I communicate fear with myself and others. I think I have had alot of...

I have had a handful of what I considered nightmares in my life. Bad dreams along lines of what I heard others speak of. Not frequent or life changing just what I perceived as normal. In my mind I had just wierd/awkward dreams. When I told people about them I could tell with a smile on my...

That was quite a response. Thank you for input.

Braveheart

Mirther?

It was yesterday

Meth

I have just realized this about myself. I can watch a movie or watch life and I realize what a caring, compasionate face means as far as nurturing. The theory is drilled in me. I know it, I do it! Anyhow I have realized that most caring and compasionate faces I have come across in my life...

About 10-15 years ago I forgot my PIN for debit card. Blah blah. I have been *showing signs/suffering from Cptsd last 5 years or so.(43 yr old) I have been seeking treatment for last 1.5 years. Only in last 6 months have I realized/admitted how dissociative I can be. I had this PIN for...

"It feels like I am being dramatic or just moaning." I have found this helpful for myself. I have found when I tell a story of a 3 year old me I tell it from a perspective of a 6 year old who has processed and moved on. A six year old story could be told by how a 10 year old processed it...