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Hi, It's been a while since I have provided an update. My husband and I are still married, and all our legal proceedings are at a standstill, though we never filed anything to begin with. (I only filled out the papers and saw the courthouse facilitator.) We were basically back together in...

So I don’t know the full story yet, but the reason my husband was so stressed and couldn’t sleep is because he was trying to figure out what to do about Guy #2. It sounds like Guy #2 misrepresented his current alcohol usage—he made it seem like he quit and/or was on the path to sobriety. My...

I think my husband is stressed or something. On Monday, he had the actual heat on at his house (wasn't using the fireplace) and it looks like he's been sleeping on the couch for the last couple of days. He mentioned forgetting to eat, and said he's been really tired. I was at his house last...

I'm sure he's being genuine with his concerns. My husband isn't the sort to be manipulative or gaslight, but I think he can be bad at understanding his feelings. He previously said he felt numb didn't believe his feelings were real, and I think this is why his words and actions aren't really...

I think there might be a bit of a push/pull dynamic developing?? (Or maybe we're in one--this isn't our first breakup, but it's been almost a decade since the last one.) My husband originally wanted to get divorced as soon as possible. I never wanted that, but after making my feelings known...

Guy #2 is on 100% disability for PTSD. From what I know about him, I suspect the reason he doesn't have visitation with his kids is because he ghosted on his family. He normally lives in an off-grid cabin in a very remote area, but the cabin has no physical address. I guess this has made it...

I do have my own place—I bought a house. We haven’t filed anything as far as our marriage goes, but we’ve been to the court mandated parenting classes, have a parenting plan, and I am the custodial parent on that. It was his parenting time on the day in question, but we were going to trade a...

Now my husband wants to move a second guy in into the garage. Guy #2 is a combat vet (he was in the army but did not serve with my husband) who gets 100% disability from the VA for PTSD. We own property out in a remote area, and Guy #2 was our sort-of neighbor out there. He has a bad reputation...

He called me after work to tell me not to come over to see the kids today. I guess he called the VA earlier, because he hadn’t heard anything about his referral. He ended up getting so frustrated with them that he asked for a different provider, and they told him he would need to start the whole...

If I thought he was making a habit of cheating, or was trying to leave me for someone else, I would feel differently. It occurred to me that there could be other women, but he really has no reason to lie to me at this point. I'm not sure about his therapy. He said used the word "psychotherapy"...

My husband called a veteran’s crisis hotline the week after I moved out. Six weeks later, he finally got a therapy appointment through the VA. He was really out of it after the appointment, and I missed two days of work to watch the kids. He tried to schedule a follow-up therapy session, and the...

Well, I'm not sure what he wants anymore. The day after he told me he didn't love me (again) we were having a conversation about why our marriage could survive the cheating and other issues, and he suddenly mumbled that he was considering not getting divorced. He said he was thinking we should...

I just found out he did cheat. Right after our youngest was born (three years ago) my husband’s old NCO came to visit and told him a lot of dark stuff about Iraq. This was a major turning point in our relationship—my husband was not the same after the guy visited. At some point, either during or...

I guess whoever he saw at the VA got back to him and told him his case was too complicated for their level of expertise. Now they referred him to a specialist. I’m not sure how he’s feeling about this news, but I suppose it’s a good sign that he’s talking to me about it at all. I’m doing my best...

My husband had his first treatment yesterday...it was rough. I took the kids before he left and kept them until bedtime, but he wasn’t at the house when I got there. I sent him a text, but I wasn’t sure he’d get it since his phone only works on WiFi. We waited in the driveway for 30 minutes...

Well, I am definitely expecting the worst. He's already got a stressful week ahead, regardless. Today he's starting a major remodel of his only bathroom, and this is coming after he just spent the entire weekend with members of his old army unity. In the past, this has always affected him...

About six weeks ago, my husband called a veteran’s crisis line to get treatment for his PTSD. He made the call days after he asked me for a divorce. We separated within a week of that (I have another thread about this) but have been in regular contact because our kids are really young. Last...

My husband has the lights off when he watches the kids. The kids are allowed to turn the lights on in their rooms, but they have to turn them off as soon as they leave. The rest of the house is dark, and they use a portable LED light to see. They do get heat from the fireplace, which is designed...

Thank you for all the replies. It sounds like my husband finally has an appointment with the VA, but he still has to wait a few more weeks. I kind of know what to expect for this--I remember him seeing a VA therapist right after we were first married, and it was a very rough time. We did not...

Well it seems he wasn’t that serious about marriage counseling, but I was sort of expecting that. I did find out that even though my husband has hot water again, he is still doing dishes and laundry in cold water. His brother also told me that my husband was visiting him and obsessively turning...

Thank you for the response. Part of the problem is that when the VA initially rated my husband for PTSD, they set his disability at the minimum, and because it’s at the minimum, he’s never been required to follow up. It’s also caused him to feel like he’s adequately rated and not seek further...

My husband is a veteran officially diagnosed with PTSD. We've been married for eight years, but a few weeks ago, he stated he wanted a divorce. His reasons were that he didn't love me anymore, felt that maybe he never loved me, said he realized we were only together because of his PTSD, said...