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BloominWinter...terrific post! I'm going to put that on my dresser mirror!!:woot:

I just can't bring myself to admit my positive Transference on T. I'm thankful that you all on the forum have helped and encouraged me, believe me I do. Meanwhile I talk all around transference stuff just to keep therapy going. T got records from my hospital that included an I.Q. test that...

Excellent advice, NoveStar, and that was terrible how the therapy team manipulated you about seeing the nurse, and used a one way window.l That's beyond cruel! I'm thinking the people who raised you were smart and cunning to cause such damage. I know my aunts were, to make me so cagey and...

This sounds a little cold, but it I had it to do over again, I would check to see if the T follows the newer techniques about treating Transference dependencies and attachment disorder. I started with my T a year ago before I researched about what techniques therapists follow, and I'm too...

Yes, it's my turn, Star. The furthest I've gotten is to tell T last week that each of my relatives that raised me told me not to ever depend on them or use them for a mother. So hard to get past that! I'm going tomorrow and already scared over what I've told last week. The word "mother" is...

I very much appreciate your comments, all of you, whether you're talking about yourselves or therapy in general. This attachment, transference, problem in me is so important. It did help to chill a little, as I was digging myself into a hole by being too scientific and analytical. I can read...

I know this sounds mundane, but one thing I've learned about talking to T is to just do some small talk between the heavier feelings. Especially about transference feelings that are so embarrassing. I'm very logical and want to have a program like going to school. Let's get to it, is my...

Your post does make a lot of sense, Nov. I do tend to analyze and try to predict everything, summarize, and make everything black & white. It's the scientist in me. I'm just beginning to realize that transference is part of a larger relationship and will unfold even if not picked apart and...

I think what's going on is probably my projection, like Digger said...I assume T doesn't allow transference because I'm so judgmental against it. But I did make some progress last session by showing T a picture of a 2 yr. old child (not me). I then said that after my mother died at one yr...

He said you don't know what you knew. He discounted your point of view. If T is going to disagree with your experience, he should wait until you're more accepting to the idea. He could be wrong, too. Anyway, he jumped way ahead of where you are, and I don't blame you for being mad at him...

I agree with you that I havn't really talked about it very directly. I talk about Inner child, but can't get up the nerve to ask plainly about MY transference for fear she will lecture me on being more independent. My fault really. I just wish she would ask me first. I want my Inner kid to...

Sometimes it helps to divide yourself into an Inner Kid and your adult self. That way, you can say that your inner kid has a problem, not you. That saves face and can get things started. Just an idea that works for me.

I've been trying hard to discuss my Transference feelings for my T, but she acts like she doesn't know anything about it. I just know that can't be true. Now I'm feeling that talking about it technically is something I'm not supposed to be smart enough to do. Instead, I'm supposed to just...

Pencil, you are so articulate and intelligent, I'm just wondering if you might benefit from reading some recent attachment articles by Michael Bolint, Charles Chessick, Dr.Winnicott, etc. They go into attachment fears especially, and how they are treated in a positive, sensitive way rather...

Elphaba, I'm so with you! I go to a county clinic and I adore my therapist, but a scheduler writes in appointments sometimes in a week or as far apart as 3 weeks. I nearly die of separation anxiety because I'm regressed to a young age in therapy. T is resigned to this. No emails, phone...

When some people ask how long it takes, they really mean they hope it takes a very long time, because they have a deep Tranference relationship going. That's me.

Tomorrow I'm going to therapy and I'm trying a different way to open up that might help someone here, too . I saw a picture of a little girl by an artist in a magazine. Her frailness and vulnerability spoke to me and seems like the inner kid I can't talk about. Hopefully, we can get started...

Thanks for your comments. I feel you relate to what I'm going through. I kind of know why I can't admit feeling transference love for T. It's because my aunts who raised me shouted at me every day, sometimes many times a day, that they weren't my mother so leave them alone. So, I always...

Much thanks for responding. My reason for therapy is that I have Inner Child issues where the 'child' is so dissociated from my adult self that I have a lot of anxiety, nightmares, horrors, etc. My adult self copes really well, but the "child' is frequently interfering. I'm a tough gal on the...

Okay, you start therapy and then find yourself in a strong Transference relationship with the therapist, but you're scared out of your socks to talk about it. So, what do you talk about to keep things going until you get up the courage? What if you find this is really the only problem you...

Off topic, Gloria, but is your avatar your Arabian horse? It looks similar to my Arabian mare, Playjo's Starlite, of a McCoy bloodline. I gave her to a therapy riding school when I had to have back surgery, and miss her very much, but they send email images of the autistic kids on her and...

Just when you're feeling down and vulnerable all this red tape and hassle comes about the P-doc. I really sympathize with what you've had to endure! I know it's hard to be tough and assertive when it's against our nature. I've had a hard time with that, too, but am getting better at speaking...

Scout, my motto about relationships is Don't ever say anything terminal that you don't really mean. I hope you will be able to say how you feel to the T and you two come to an agreement together rather than just disappear. I sense some ambivalence, and just don't want you to get hurt.

Star, your anxiety is so heart wrenching. I hope so much this experience works out for you and looks like your T fully understands. I'm writing because I could have written your post, I'm so scared of rejection. I can't speak up because every day of my life as a child I heard the words...