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Really pleased to see how well we're doing, wonder how early we'll meet the twelve month goal?

We can only tell you what we know; whether from our own experiences or seeing someone else go through it. I don't tend to talk to 'other' people about problems that I know are caused by PTSD, because I know they won't understand. Just as I wouldn't have understood if a friend had come to me...

So we are planning to spend the day with friends. You notice I am a bit quiet and ask what is wrong. I say I don't want to talk about it at the moment. You choose to push the matter, so I explain and get extremely upset in doing so. You have the option to leave me to pull myself together...

You help by being there, and dealing with the day to day stuff she can't handle. If her father knows, then talking probably isn't going to do anything. Maybe this will have been the wake-up call he needs and his current distance is him trying to deal with reality; both of her abuse and...

Hey @Alex00 Hubby's stay in the unit helped him tremendously. He felt safe to express himself without worrying about others, he felt validated, he saw a psychiatrist for the first time, got different medication and was taught various different tools to try and help himself. It was certainly...

Hi @Alex00 I'm so sorry to hear you are going through all of this. I have taken hubby to A&E twice when he was feeling suicidal, so I know how hard it is to deal with the NHS. The first time we just accepted what they told us, about no beds, etc and went home with the instructions that I...

It can be so spooky to see your own thoughts written by someone else! I love @Sweetpea76's advice. Do something for you, ignore him for a bit - he can probably cope without you for a while. They say that babies learn to smile around the time the mother is coming to the end of her rope. I do...

And sometimes we have bad days too, where we need someone to turn to. But we can't turn to our partners about this. And because we love, and want to protect them, we can't talk to 'outsiders' who just don't understand and will judge them unfairly. So we come here to vent, rant, complain and...

Hubby brings in about 15% of our income; just enough to cover his child support with a bit of 'pocket money' left over. I pay for all the househpld bills, holidays, even his son's mobile 'phone. I do get a bit annoyed if he then uses his credit card to buy stuff 'just because' as I'm the one...

But it is a good thing, and he can't change that. Have you told him that it would be nice if he could be supportive, and maybe try to understand how important this is to you? I know it's not the same, but we'll all give you celebratory :hug: and cheers. According to hubby I spend my days...

@Cj77 - my hamster (in her ball) did actually used to chase my (very scaredy) cat! _funny-pictures-kitten-offers-to-help-sad-friend by Purplemunchkin posted Aug 17, 2015 at 4:56 PM

We each keep a notebook and compare them before appointments; both physical and psychological complaints and concerns get written down. It's actually really interesting, and occasionally worrying, to see where the accounts differ. Good luck with the new doc!

Hubby last went to work in December 2012, and was finally medically retired from the police on 31 August 2014. Tomorrow he starts the training course for his new career as a care assistant. I'm so proud of him, and how far he has come since I met him. I am nervous that the hours or the people...

:hug: @Futuremrs I had one of those evenings yesterday. As soon as I walked in the door after work I could tell he was in that frame of mind. I just concentrate on remembering the good stuff. The 'why I'm here' bits. There are lots of them. Some lyrics from a Matt Goss song spring to...

I loved living alone. I enjoyed the freedom of not being accountable to another person, of being able to avoid other humans from Friday to Monday (not always, but when I wanted to). I think it made me stronger and have to be independent (except when there were spiders :nailbiting: ). And when...

I'm so sorry to read all that you are going through Bookoffee. I don't have any words of wisdom to offer, only :hug: if you want/need them. x

And then some! I don't have much of a temper, and am quite patient, but if hubby had spoken to me like that when I was doing him a favour the response would have been something along the lines of "if you don't like the way I'm doing it you are welcome to do it yourself".

Ask him if he thinks [it] is a big deal. Assuming he says no, ask if he respects you. Assuming he says yes, tell him it is a big deal to you and shouldn't make a difference to him, other than to know he has made you happy/more relaxed/less anxious.

Congratulations on moving in together. Of course things will be bumpy to start with, it is a big adjustment for both of you. Please try to stop thinking about it in these terms though (easier said than done I know). It will just immediately put you in a negative frame of mind and will...

Of course he should apologise. He may not be reacting rationally in that moment, but he should understand afterwards that he was out of order. If he doesn't think he was out of order, then it's the man you need to question rather than the PTSD. It is different if dissociation is involved, as...

This is where individuality comes in, and how every person reacts differently. I would send hubby a text confirming the details of when he needed to pick me up. I wouldn't mention alternatives as this would mean he had to make a decision, which would stress him out more than following through...

I used to be involved with the Samaritans (although they don't seem to very popular round here) and the branch I was at (south east so no good for you) was full of lovely people. They seem to be very good at sifting out the do-gooders that just don't 'get it' and think they need to fix people...

Easier said than done I know, but stop feeling guilty for caring about more than just him. It won't do you, him, or your daughter any favours. Take comfort from the fact that he obviously loves, needs and misses you (as he should!), but that he understands and accepts you need to be doing...

I posted one last year https://www.myptsd.com/threads/good-news-for-a-change.45769/ I can't say whether our relationship is stronger due to PTSD as I didn't know hubby before his diagnosis. I do love him though. I wouldn't come to these forums if I didn't.

Er, yay, ouch, yay? The best ice-breakers always seem to be the most extreme ;) Good luck with the car, the sleep, and the new guy!