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thank you all for your replies and encouragement. Its good to know that I am not alone. There are so many pieces to healing. I

thanks ladee

thank you. I want to get back up, of course part of me doesn't want to do anything but that is not an option. I do have a trauma therapist. I have before as well. I guess the missing piece was around boundaries.. I do hope you find someone you trust to work with you too thanks Alice

thank you brat. :)

I'm glad you found something that works for you, thats great

haven't read the article, but freeze was my instinctive reaction. Learning to change that into healthy boundaries and get the F* out if it feels wrong!

I love the title of your thread. It takes tremendous courage to move through pain, and to know your own goodness. I'm glad you know you are good and you are right, its OK to be you :)

Now that I look back on the last 5 years, I was not taking care of myself. SOme of it was situational, but much was by choice. I knew symptoms were reappearing, but I just kept doing things that brought up the past. And now the depression is here, and I was so hoping I would never have it visit...

wonderful. You never know when a great opportunity will arise, and just being open to something new and good gave you this opportunity.

wonderful. Its always good to hear stories of healing. :)