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same with me. 40 pounds in a year. I was going to post this this morning when I found yours. i'm too anxious to eat but also can't keep food down. i suppose this is normal, or i'm been supposing this is normal. But i Think it can't be neglected. i can see my ribs too. I've never had an eating...

Oops - texting on bus en route to therapy and the thing hit post too fast. Was going to say will focus on positive concept of clearing debris. Lighter. Uncongested. Space to introduce new ways. A new self. A new belief system. A new behavioral ideology. Thank you.

I like the word "stage" because that means I'll move through it. I should concentrate on tiny nice things to build up tolerance for it. Like all you wonderful people who have saved my day. I beat up myself on floodgate days (stoic ideology says it's failure) and think of the wound cleaning...

Ah, never thought of that. comprehensive desensitization. Funny thing about the kind of work I did (human rights, conflict zones, etc) is that i was TRAINED to be desensitized. Desensitization was a fundamental job requirement. Now it's..........training myself to appropriately sensitize? I was...

you mention the existence of tricks....

oh my. thank you. Going to digest all this. I'm having all these physiological symptoms (lost 40 pounds, near adrenal failure, hormones completely bizarre, hair falling out and turning white in patches, uti infections, digestive demons). I developed adrenaline/repression junkie workflow of...

thanks for the fair warning. mind = blown. Makes sooooooo much sense. Thanks. That chart helps a lot in terms of explaining what is happening in my head when any kind of stimulus comes my way. So now I just focus on getting the PTSD smaller and smaller. No problem. That should take a day or two...

it's funny - i 100% don't even care if the success ends. I've never been in it for the acclaim, and have intentionally kept myself in the background (i.e. fieldworker not talking head) - when I left fieldwork and became an artist I assumed it would be total failure, which was comforting. A nice...

YES: "It brings connections with others that seem to make me vulnerable to trauma." I'm also a "solid solutions" person. For a poet, I'm enormously practical and I want tactics, tools, anything to dismantle the internal ideology. Luckily (???) I have a late afternoon appointment with my somatic...

I can't figure it out. I know that I'm dealing - to my complete surprise - with enormous levels of shame. But the rest of it...I don't know. I'm so terrified. It hurts to be loved. I can't believe it's real, because I feel like a useless failed person. Then I wonder where all these people were...

First, a bit of context for my question - I was diagnosed with PTSD in a 1992 but not treated, after which a million other traumatic incidents gradually infinitely compounded it. My profession for 20 years was as a human rights fieldworker; in 2007 I crashed and became artist and writer making...

I'm in the same spot - started therapy in August (somatic experiencing), 20 years untreated, all the old "coping" mechanisms falling away = pain. Not what I expected. I think it's a shedding of the old skin, a lot of vulnerability, plus also we survived by, in a sense, not feeling. I've...

Thank you so much. This really really helps. I've been so totally alone - this feels amazing! KINDNESS! EMPATHY! I really need to remember the bravery element - thanks for pointing it out. There are colleagues and friends who now avoid me because they're hoping they can keep it all pushed down...

Curious why it gets worse. The first wave was relief, and then now it's just shame, shame, shame over losing so much daily functioning so quickly. I'm lucky to have a few months to concentrate on my healing, but I don't really know what that means beyond the weekly therapy appointment - my...

Thank you. This started to flare badly in March, and I've been isolating myself pretty strongly, so this is a big step for me, and exciting. I built such a reputation as being the strong one who could handle anything, and a lot of friends and colleagues aren't really comprehending the massive...

Hi everyone. I was diagnosed with primary PTSD in 1992, and just started treatment (somatic experiencing plus "normal" therapy) in August 2015, where I got additionally diagnosed with secondary PTSD after twenty years of personal and professional incidents in human rights work around conflict...