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There are so many wonderful, healthy recipes with turmeric too, just cooking with it regularly seems like a great idea. Put in veggies you like. Eggplant!!! :)

Did you doctors test for Lyme disease? It is possible to have multiple issues of course... a friend with ptsd also had Lyme and the fevers were a big clue... doctors missed it for 8 years in her..

There is a thing called a "dissociative fugue" which might fit, but you need to ask a professional -- ideally someone with relevant specializations, like with trauma, dissociation, etc.

@Chava -- I know that you value exercise a lot (me too!)... can your body tolerate any exercise type that really gets your heart rate up around 70% for your age? I often use a treadmill and tilt its angle way up so I don't have to do anything really fast -- fast walking seems to bother my knees...

@Chava -- I use a heating pad a lot. Sometimes a cat does the trick, if I can get them to keep their claws in! But generally a heating pad, then I do stretches after the muscles are warm. Re. why we get these spasms... it's very common w/chronic childhood trauma, probably with other trauma...

I like this idea a lot, it feels like a very good thing to do -- it's a very positive connection. I might also put a tiny bit of your service dog's hair on the gift, but I'm weird. (Cat hair seems to end up everywhere where I've been...) This is a very hard time, please do your best to be good...

@Lovealways -- I don't know this therapist, but I have to say I'm quite angry at your T at the moment... I would like to suggest the possibility that it is not you who is failing at therapy, but the T who has some problems.. they both need to learn more about trauma treatment, and perhaps more...

I am fairly sure that depersonalization and derealization are subtypes of dissociation; this is mentioned various places, such as: http://www.isst-d.org/?contentID=76 "There are five main ways in which the dissociation of psychological processes changes the way a person experiences living...

Does anyone else find the words "depersonalization" and "derealization" strange and a bit "off"? They don't seem to fit, to the extent that I had no clue that they pertain to various experiences I have on and off until I read examples of them (like in this test). The only problem is... I have...

44 -- feels very weird to see that on the screen; if I'd taken this years ago I might have scored lower even though these issues are improving (great T!) -- I used to go around numb all the time, not feeling parts of my body etc. but a lot of that was "normal"; you need a *remembered, different*...

Do you have a therapist who is familiar with childhood trauma and dissociation? You deserve help for what you are going through now, as you try to figure these things out. Good therapists can help you explore the fragments without "leading" you in any direction -- while helping you gain skills...

Hello Chava, I actually joined a Unitarian Universalist (UU) church last winter after sporadically attending for many years, and am still learning more about it -- but I think that can continue indefinitely. Our church is definitely a wonderful community; it sounds like you've read the Seven...

The absolute, crazy and utter twisting denial; such a profound lack of taking responsibility as the mother of both you and your sister in your mother's statement about your sister a few years ago, has me stunned. I read your post about hospitalization too; I really hope that you will do what...

For me, even the tiniest statements about abuse of myself and others in my family, tends to be very difficult to make when I don't know if the person I'm talking to will be safe with the information. The conversation with that person can sort of feel like it is rimmed in fire in my memory... I...

I have a Galaxy S4 but my computers at home and work are Apple... OSX is different from IOS though. I am actually considering switching right now to an iPhone, the S4 has some issues... maybe I should wait for the next iPhone though? Anyone hear of an amazing new iPhone being sent by Jobs from...

@ghotiff -- I still have trouble believing that my symptoms are "real", or it's like they are not in the same reality as the people around me. Having a great physical therapist who can tell loads of things my muscles and joints are doing (and help them!) without me having to talk about them is...

Mine hasn't been a jolt so far, but being actually present and aware that I'm present used to be so rare that I was very surprised when it did. It is hard to maintain and I lose track of it without really noticing, esp. if I start needing to deal with anything, focus on external things...

Hello @FindingMyself88 -- I'm sorry that the medical folks are not helping more... What occurs to me when reading your account of their reactions is that even well-educated MDs cannot be experts on everything. The brain changes with PTSD -- dissociative subtypes, PNES, etc. are not well...

Welcome, @Theresa1122 . There aren't really words for this, but I am so sorry for what happened to you, and his family's denial is totally nuts -- it can be determined whether he fired the gun or not scientifically and that must have been told to them. However I am very glad that you have a...

A number of things have been helping for me. Those scientific articles, oddly enough. They are putting some experiences like mine on paper, where I can go back and read them in the "real world" anytime I want. I can be somewhat more connected to the old reality, here in a room with no people...

@Chava -- trusting my own reality is a really complicated issue for me and hard to explain -- I need some sleep so will try this weekend I think. It's not even "yes or no". It's been different realities simultaneously, but shifting awareness of them, and not questioning that for safety/lack of...

Thanks everyone for the great replies; I didn't realize that PTs get a lot of psychology training. In this case I think that they might have had more training with the type of PTSD with lots of flashbacks etc. from an adult trauma, but possibly not much with what would now be called the...

Does anyone have ideas and/or experience in communicating with physical therapists or similar folks about trauma-related issues, especially when dissociation sorts of issues might be slowing down one's ability to relax and make "normal" progress? I have been working with a great person and find...

Everyone's chemistry and trauma is different, so there will be lots of different responses here. I have been on Paxil for a long time... when things in life were going ok I could do without it, but if something triggered old stuff (or if my abuser surfaced again in reality, which happened...

I have had short periods where I don't seem to adapt to temperatures well; I seem to be feeling shaky at the same time, and I think I feel a bit panicky, it feels like the whole world is too hot or too cold and I can't deal. I have never measured my temp during this. I have also tried eating...