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I totally agree. It WOULD be better for me, but I don't know how. I'm very anxious these days. like if I don't have something pre-occupying my mind, I am fidgety and want to get up and DO something. I hope its just a phase and things will mellow out again.

Yes....three jobs....I'm not sure why I'm doing this but I've committed at least through the end of the year so I have to do it for another couple weeks at a minimum. I KNOW the holidays triggered me. My PTSD was diagnosed after watching my father suddenly die (on a holiday), but I think that...

I really get this feeling. I do this too. I've come to the belief that expectations = disappointments so if I don't have expectations that something will happen or should happen, then I'm not disappointed. I'm not quite sure how to change that or if I even should. I'm so sorry for your...

I'm so discouraged. Just when I think I'm getting steps ahead of my PTSD, I fall back and it is discouraging. I am on hold with my therapist because my insurance company decided that I'm HEALED! I can't afford the sessions without my insurance. To the meat of the matter. I have just taken...

Welcome Conan! When you do figure it out or are ready, we will still all be here! Take your time!

Hi Edna! Welcome. I hope you find being here as helpful and comforting as I have. I recently read a book from an author that has tourettes and he spoke of the bullying that he received as a child and it was heartbreaking. (((HUGS))) to you.

Hi Sue.....I'm the sufferer so I'm not much help but its nice to see a supporter trying to help their spouse. Sometimes it takes tough love and sometimes it takes being there....its so hard to know the difference and sometimes the sufferer themselves don't even know what they need!

Hi wintersmoke. Welcome. With or without the C, we all just want to find some healing and that's all that counts, right? I'm glad you are here.

Nightmares again last night. It was a looooooong night.

Thanks Legend...my nightmares are more re-living what I saw. They came back last night. Just over and over again and I wake up and go back into the dream again when I fall asleep. I see my brother running out telling us to call 911 and yelling for his wife (she is a nurse). I just see my dad...

I'm glad you are talking to a therapist. I can relate to the death issues. I watched my dad die and it is the cause of my PTSD. I cannot imagine being accused of a false crime and dealing with the repercussions of the accusations. I am glad you are here.

Things seem to be getting better. I haven't had a nightmare in a few nights. I also started working out and it really seems to help. I do an hour of Zumba a couple nights a week and do thirty minutes of cardio the other days.

I have trouble falling asleep sometimes, well, a lot of times. I lay there and it's quiet and dark and I think about my dad and everything that happened with his death and I have a panic attack. I don't even know WHY I have a panic attack. When I do, I have to get up and move for a few...

(((HUGS))) to you. I also witnessed my fathers death. He died suddenly of a heart attack while my brothers were trying to save him. Minus the hallucinations, I have those problems too. I know that my problems may last forever but I hope that they lessen or my ability to handle them becomes...

Oh Axel....you have been through so much. I'm just going to tell you to keep on keeping on. Every little bit of help that you get will keeping adding up until you can handle what happened. (((HUGS))))

Hmm....I'm not sure how to recognize it. I'm not even sure that I recognize all my triggers yet. I know my obvious ones, but not all of them I'm sure. You said that she recently got diagnosed so she may be in that position as well. Have you thought about seeing an independent counselor...

Hi Carebear. I do hope you can speak to a counselor or therapist and get a diagnosis, whether it be PTSD or not. (((HUGS))) to you.

Medic- Thank you for your service. My job helps me to escape sometimes and I can't imagine it not being that way. Its where I don't have time to think about anything but work and what I need to accomplish before I leave for the day. Your job so closely relates to your trauma that hurts my heart...

Hi TMAC! I think that the support you give your wife is awesome. I can relate to the anger issues that come with PTSD. I KNOW I can be terrible sometimes and what is worse is I KNOW I'm doing it and I just don't know how to stop. Its a long, slow work in progress. I am glad that she is in...

I'm sorry for what happened to you. Forgiveness is hard. People say that forgiveness is for YOU and not the other person. That forgiving doesn't mean you have to allow that person back into your life or that you have to forget what they did. Its hard to forgive and not feel like we are...

I hope it went well tonight Legend.

Hi unbelievable. That's okay. I didn't share the details of my story the first day I was here either. Have you been diagnosed as having PTSD? Are you seeing a therapist or counselor? Welcome.

I'm sorry that it happened to you. I think one of the important things about this forum is that you "meet" people who are in different stages of healing. There are people who are at the beginning and still learning how to even begin to move forward, people who are steps ahead of that and then...

This hit home for me. I am coming to this realization in my own life now and I'm working on it, slowly but surely. Thank you for posting and I'm glad you have hit your realizations too.

I am fairly new but I log in in the evenings mostly. There might be a day or two that go by that I don't log in or only log in to see if there are replies to my posts. I usually DO check in pretty often though. I will admit that I can pretty much tell by the title of a thread if I will read...