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Thank you.

Thanks everyone. I not going to therapy on Tuesday. I am just a mess. I am looking stuff, can't focus, I just want to lay in bed. I can't cry as the only emotion I feel is anger right now. I can't sleep all I want to do is eat junk food. I am going to try to find a way to get myself back to a...

This is the first time I have tried to be completely honest in therapy and I don't want to do it anymore. Remembering the childhood abuse, the rapes, the boss that made me give him blow jobs and hand jobs, the abusive relationship is all to much for me. I have a journal specifically for therapy...

My therapist agreed with me that maybe I should take a break from digging so deep and dealing with all of the mixed emotions. In therapy we talked about how I feel after hard sessions, what I can do to help myself get peace, and things to remember after hard sessions. I can honestly say that I...

Yes...I remember some things but there are some things I just don't remember. It is frustrating to me sometimes.

Ever since my Mom told me it was ok for cousin to touch me and make me touch him I have struggled. She said it was childhood experimenting. It happened for a few years. Anyway...I have not talked to anyone about until I started therapy. I asked my therapist if she believes me and she said yes. I...

Thank you! I will try to remind myself of these things. I appreciate all of your kind words and encouragement.

I have a few techniques that I do. I take epsom salt eucalyptus baths, yoga and meditation and I make sure I exercise once a week at least. I also use deep breathing to help. Maybe it is just hard because this was the first week I let my therapist about the childhood abuse. She knows things have...

Nightmares are most nightly right now. I may get 4.5 hours of sleep a night and I work two jobs. I actually left my full time job today because I just feel so defeated right now.

Thank you @hodge I will try to give my head a break and hope I snap out of this soon. @ladee I will try to rest. I will not sleep well but maybe I can can relax enough rest. Thank you for your kind words! I appreciate it.

Do you ever feel like you just can't? No words, no feelings, nothing...You just can't. :cry:

Thank you all so much! I appreciate all of the information you have given me and I will talk to her about how the sessions are making me feel. I am trying to not quit because that would not be good either. Thank you again!

I really am sorry if I sound like a broken record but therapy is so hard right now. I have a therapy journal now and I write my feelings down or what is going on and we focus on what I have written. It is easier then actually telling her but the catch is I have answer all of her questions. I...

Thank you...I am learning that. I am not sure how to be ok with it. I cry a lot in my car or in my bed when I am alone.

It is ok to ask...I try to hide it because I have heard several people say that depression is not real. I have had people say that depression is just a way for people to get attention. Also my ex would do and say mean things to me if I started to feel myself sliding. So I just try really hard to...

@Mal Content I do give my daughter some chores. She is 16 so she is not going to do anymore than asked. Lol. My kitchen is the cleanest but that is because I absolutely hate dirty dishes in the sink when I need to cook. Lol. Unfortunately my bedroom is the worst. I told my self that today I will...

It is getting harder for me to hide my depression. My house is not clean, I no longer make my bed, my office desk is so unorganized. It all just makes me even sadder (if that is word). I love my house clean and getting into a freshly made bed. I do my laundry and leave it in the hamper and I...

To bad I am still the princess of avoidance. I get really anxious about going then I leave angry because I don't do what I planned to do.

Thank you! Thank you!

Thank you everyone. I will talk to her again. I hope we can figure something out. I am trying not to give up. I have major trust issues with therapists and this did not help.

I went to my therapist's office and the receptionist was not at her desk. As I am waiting more and more people were coming in. I cannot handle being in a small room with a lot of people. The receptionist finally tells me she will let her know I was there but I still waited for 15 mins. My...

Thank you!

Thank you!

I have been really struggling this week but today I actually had a great day. My birthday is this week and my family had a really big surprise party for me. I love to roller skate so it was a surprise skating party. My podiatrist told me no more speed skates so my parents and my daughter bought...

My abuser would always say don't tell anyone or you will get in trouble. I did tell once but it was pretty much ignored. I did not tell again, several years went by and he would tell me this everytime he climbed in bed woth me. Currently I feel his voice haunts me at night telling me not to...