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@Greta I've started having this issue. It's either a trigger or just an opportunity to intellectualize it. Too many "feels" or not enough. A lot of times I talk to avoid, and when I do I'm not talking about the right things. It just invents more "issues" ... The book you recommend has...

YMMV - You know what they say about advice ... I think of it as though everyone's "bad" is the same level bad. Our brains inflate the bad to fill up the room regardless of the actual quality of the bad. In that sense, if someone has a toothache and that's their worst problem, it's every bit as...

You're my role model today. If I could remember "my issue, my job to find my solution" rather than acting out even half the time, I'd be twice a better person.

Self-respect is a biggie too. I learned it as: Self-esteem = Self-Acceptance + Self-respect + Self-responsibility • Self-Esteem: the view and opinion you hold about yourself and your worth • Self-Acceptance: I accept who I am, I accept trauma, I accept my PTSD, I accept that it's not fair...

THIS. I worried so much about whether I was being reasonable and not "PTSD-y" -- not to mention the effects of the abandonment layer -- that I've been the enabler of some pretty crappy behavior in past relationships. I see a behavior I know I have a problem with, but it's hard to figure out...

Thank you. Of course I don't mind! We all deserve as much help and insight as we can get. I'm grateful for benefit you, or anyone else, gets from it!

I'm sorry for what happened to you. Please understand that I am honestly not criticizing your viewpoint -- I have zero room to pass judgment. I am not asking for empathy -- you were hurt, and, in my opinion, you don't need the additional emotional weight of trying to empathize with what hurt...

I came across a post written several years ago in a forum on this site that but that I can't link to because ... I don't know why. Some "doesn't meet minimum requirements" thing that the system thinks it's nefarious. Anyway, it's titled Stressor vs Trigger: What is a Trigger if you want to look...