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Oh yes this rings a LOT of bells. Its like I'm ultra looking out for myself and ready to defend myself against any injustice. The rage and anger is totally disproportionate to any infringement (if indeed there is any). It's totally draining. I think this makes a lot of sense; if things are...

This seems very wise advice indeed. For a long time clinicians thought I was bi-polar cos of the highs and lows. When I get a good day I just want to embrace and get totally hyper. It's a good idea to focus my wellbeing on both the highs and lows. Why do you think there is such a crash after the...

Thankyou i needed to hear that. I just feel so embarrassed about how i behaved yesterday. I hate who I become when I'm out of control. I've spent the whole day in bed today as I've utterly exhausted myself. But you're right I'm still here.

Ok; positive thing is that I do manage to have good days now. Not so positive is that the day after a good day is inversely proportional to how good the day was. So Good day= bad next day. Really good day (like wonderful day out Saturday) = horrendous screaming harpie woman destroys her own...

Dear Lorraine. It's sounds like a very difficult situation for you. The one thing I would strongly say to you regarding mental health services is keep asking, asking and asking again. Until you get what you need for you. Not all counsellors, therapists are the same. Some you click with others...

Hi Lorraine - I'm sorry to hear you've been having a rough time. Is it a particularly bad time or just the 'usual' ? I wondered where you were. Glad you've been back in touch. I've started the EMDR and it is being very very productive. I won't say it's easy at all but the results have been...

Faye Jayne thankyou, good idea. I think that I was just hugely tired from interrupted sleep. I ended up sleeping all afternoon and then slept right through the night too (that is a very rare thing for me!). Going to give today a better more balanced go of things. Thankyou all for your advice.

gosh that's 3 weeks off for you, nearly there though! Well done! I have a little chart that I have on my kitchen wall with sections for mindfulness, creativity and physical activity, with the aim that I tick at least one every day. I KNOW that all of these things help, so far today I've done...

Thankyou both for your kind words It's been 12 days since I saw T and 9 days to go, so over the hill. I agree that breaks can be great times to reflect and I am trying to do that. I think the problem this time is that we hit something really significant before the break and I feel like I'm...

Help...I'm 4 months into EMDR for Complex - PTSD. We've really started getting somewhere but the last couple of weeks my therapist has had to be away on holiday. I've know the whole time this was coming up so it wasn't a sudden surprise. I really have been trying to look after myself but I feel...

@zoie33 - disassociating is pants isn't it? However I wonder if you would ever have imagined that you might be saying one day 'I'm coming to the end of one memory'. I definitely had a breakthrough this week. During my intense dreams, which often have repetition in the them, I actually asked...

I want to say it was pure torture zoie33 - I think that if you want to say this then you SHOULD say it. Honesty has got to be the best idea. I'm glad to hear you have other ways of keeping yourself grounded and that you have some space before your next session. I too find it really squirm...

Zoie33 it sounds like you're going through the mill with this. Do you have any other 'tools' you can use at the moment to keep you grounded? Eg Mindfulness, safe place visualisation? I know different things work for different people; and different things work at different times. I agree honesty...

Hi Lorraine. I'm in total agreement with you about this forum. It seems much more proactive and positive than other forums I've looked at. I don't feel like it is bogging me down. I've had a funny couple of days. I'm currently in the early stages of EMDR which is working but still very...

I'm doing an hour once a week. I've been told it could last for a year. Initially we did work on finding a safe place to visualise so that I've got somewhere to 'retreat' if things get too overwhelming. Each new memory we look at we start by looking at a statement that this memory makes me feel...

I've only just joined this forum, and i can see you have too Lorraine. Hopefully we'll be able to get some support from like minded people on here. How's your day been?

My son is 16 and I've tried to treat telling him about C-PTSD in the same way I'd tell him I had a headache or i was tired. He doesnt know any details but as he's grown older he's known that there are reasons why i behave in the way i do. Children seem to plug into your emotions especially if...

Lorraine, I too am tremendously hard on myself. I think this is par for the course. I'm trying to view it like a symptom (well it is a symptom) after all i guess i wouldn't get wound up over why I was limping if I'd hurt my foot. I'm really trying make it background noise and just do little...

My understanding is that your brain should wander all over the place as it tries to resort the memories so it can put them away correctly. It is really weird what connections your memories make. I'm trying not to think to much about why those connections exist and just go with the flow

Beautiful parks in the city

Hi - I have C-PTSD and I've just started EMDR after trying various other therapies for years. I've had about 2 months of weekly sessions so far and I can totally relate to everyone's comments. We started with my earliest memory and it really is incredible how the EMDR helps re-jiggle all your...

I'm grateful for the love of my husband, who never gives up on me

Hi Lorrainess I am struggling with this very problem at the moment. I'm feeling like I want to live - I have lots and lots of ideas of what I'd like to do whizzing round my head but when I get to starting it I just freeze and can't do it. I find it SOOO frustrating. Hours can be lost in a day...