Recent content by InNeedOfGuidance

How is everyone else doing? I hope well.

@abs_21 I texted her 2 days after the dinner to wish her luck at the doctor as she had a cough she could not get rid of and asked her to let me know how it goes. That was on 4/18. I have not heard back from her and I am OK with that. In a way I think meeting with her gave me a closure and...

@Gingerly she said she just wants to be friends and not in a relationship with me or anyone else. She started to see a Psychologist three weeks ago to work on issues she has had even before she met me and went to Afghanistan. She said even if she never went to Afghanistan she would have...

Well it is late and I am tired, but it went well I think. I admit I messed up a bit at the end (went against advice given here on the board) and said stuff I should not have, but that ended up being OK. Let me see if I can express quickly how it went: I got there 15 minutes before she did and...

Does anyone think it would be inappropriate for me to get my ex a birthday gift or is dinner enough? Would getting her a gift maybe make her feel uncomfortable? Maybe just a gift-card in a card??? What if I just call it a welcome home from Afghanistan gift?

@Snowangel1225 what exactly is it that made you so stressed? I think you may have been the one to mention that the sufferer may feel more vulnerable and it is the feelings that go along with being with that supporter. Overall, it is just so confusing for me (not trying at all to downplay...

I am definitely not a co-dependent and in fact I actually consider myself to be very independent like my pop-pop was. I guess one of my "fears" for lack of better words is I do truly want her to be happy, but I am not sure I will ever be able to comprehend it if she ends up with another...

@Snowangel1225 Thank you so much. It is definitely hard not to have expectations, especially when I cannot stop thinking about how happy we were together, how easily we clicked right from our first impromptu date, how she told me in a card she sent to me right when she got to Afghanistan that I...

@Gingerly How long has he had PTSD? I say you have to ask because the answer is always no unless you do, but then again I am not sure if I am qualified to give the best advice right now for this situation as I am meeting my ex-gf tonight for the first time in 9 months to celebrate her birthday...

Gingerly...are you thinking about reaching out to your ex? How long has it been since you two have talked or seen each other?

I want to thank everyone again for listening and their advice. It really means a lot to me to be able to talk like this to others who have gone through this already. I know it is not easy for any of us to necessarily talk about our experiences, but to be selfless like everyone here has been...

I understand and the last thing I want to do is make it about me. I am worried that she may bring up the past though or ask if I miss her or something like this which I then have to think how to answer that while being honest with her. My thinking is keep it brief and not very detailed and...

All of this is excellent advice and I agree it is best to keep it light. It will be very hard not to express my emotions with her though as we had been 100% open and honest with each other from the first time we met. It is also hard to imagine her being with anyone else especially if they end...

Thank you for the input abs_21. It is much appreciated as is all of the input from everyone. I am glad to hear that things are working out with you and your ex or at least it is progressing. I will definitely have to bite my tongue and not say anything that may upset her or cause friction...

Seaotter, once again this is why I like boards like this. I helps me to realize (as best as it can) that I did nothing wrong and that I am not on an island by myself. We both love the ones that have gotten like this yet they push/pull us and it becomes very painful. While we realize how hurt...