Recent content by katz

  1. katz

    Childhood Dumb question about csa

    Thank you for listening to my note Spinningmytires. I appreciate your note back. I think it is wonderful that you have found a T that you can work with. I have been going thru T after T for most of my life. The first ones I remember are when I was in early school. The T even talked to my...
  2. katz

    News Worldwide impact of the novel coronavirus (covid-19)

    Didn't you know that "you can't put anything on the internet that is not true?!!" (Pure joke!) I work for a trumper. He listens to the the talk radio stations from the moment he gets here to when he leaves late at night- and believes all of it! I was surprised he even got his shots. How sad. :(
  3. katz

    Childhood Dumb question about csa

    I also have a hard time believing myself when something bothers me. I have very vivid memories of "him" saying to me "that doesn't hurt". To this day I still don't react much to being hurt physically. I just say 'ouch" then go on. Yet, inside I'm screaming. I commend any of you who have gotten...
  4. katz

    Childhood Dumb question about csa

    Most of mine are just very uncomfortable feelings. It can take me days to figure out what exactly triggered it. But, once I do. It reassures me that I am able to handle it at this time. I have also found over the years, at least for me, is that once I have figured out what it was, (smell...
  5. katz

    Childhood Dumb question about csa

    I went many years without any confirmation. Finally I went looking. Sometimes I wish I hadn't, but the proof for me is worth it. I wrote it all down so that I could go back to see it when I start misbelieving myself again. These days I don't need to. I have enough proof for me of all the...
  6. katz

    Childhood Dumb question about csa

    I wish I could. I tried to once. I told the family and everyone got very angry at me. It was like being re-traumatized..... I don't talk to any family about it anymore. That was over 25 years ago. I even avoid the subject with my husband, even though he does know that something happened. I'm...
  7. katz

    Childhood Dumb question about csa

    Since I was so young when "he" started, I just came to learn that pain down there is normal. I learned to tolerate it. To ignore it. I can remember sitting in my room on the floor in tears and just telling myself that "this is what life is". To this day, if I hurt - anywhere on or inside my...
  8. katz

    News Worldwide impact of the novel coronavirus (covid-19)

    I would never wish harm or sickness or pain on anyone - ever. After saying that...I want to ask how anyone else feels regarding "already being diagnosed" with PTSD and watching the world today. I know that the many, many deaths that have occured will generate more people with problems similar...
  9. katz

    Finding comfort in triggering media

    A lot of my "times" were when I was very young too. I can remember going down to the school office to ask for my "mommy" because I was having a "tummy ache". It took me many years to learn that those kind of feelings and descriptions are very common for children when they hurt emotionally. The...
  10. katz

    Finding comfort in triggering media

    I find that by watching it - or listening to something that reminds me of a an instance - makes me not only remember, but it helps me to face it head on. It also lets me take notice of how I'm feeling and then I try to figure out why or what caused these feelings. Sometimes I can figure it out...
  11. katz

    Hallucinations with dissociative symptoms

    I'm not sure if this helps - but most of my memories are from "up there" (floating by the ceiling, looking down) . Back in the 70's they diagnosed epilepsy. I was medicated all my life till I was diagnose with PTSD - since then I have had none of the systems or "feelings" that I had growing up...
  12. katz

    What did you feel like when you got diagnosed?

    Over the years, as I have recovered more memories (not the emotions though) I have started to understand why I am the way I am. It is amazing how much of "me" is based on what happened to me back then. I often wonder what or who I could have been if it had not happened - or if I had gotten the...
  13. katz

    What did you feel like when you got diagnosed?

    I have been seeing T since I was in grade school ! The one that I saw for the longest is still in practice ! I looked him up -- sure would like to tell him what was going on right before his eyes. Back then, in the 70's, he spoke to me for about 20 minutes, then talked to my parents for about...
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