Recent content by LillyH

I did the court case Fact Find for my daughter and told and betrayed my ex by telling everything about the abuse he has done to keep my daughter safe so that everyone knows what a psychopath he is. However I got ripped to shreds and they tore apart every aspect of me, motherhood, career, sex...

My very abusive husband did almost exactly what you talk about for 17 years and I was like you and didn't think it was rape. I just thought I was a prude! However when I was seeing my trauma therapist I had my light bulb moment when she was telling me about other clients and I suddenly realised...

I just need this pain to stop. I am now drinking to try to stop feeling anything. I need this to stop. I am not strong enough to cope, I feel hopeless but I just want the pain to end. I am not strong enough to keep going. I am exhausted and never feel that things will change or get better. There...

Hi, It's great you joined. I joined a few weeks ago and people have been so so supportive and I wish I had reached out when I was first diagnosed as I...

Thank you x

Thank you for your replies they made me feel a bit less insane. I just find managing this really hard and don't understand what my head is doing. It's like I know it's real and has happened but then there is so many people saying it's not and as they are 'professionals' i.e. Doctors I think they...

i am so scared! I am going through a court case for my daughter who is in foster care due to my mental health and suicide ideation from 17 years of severe domestic abuse. Anyway I thought I was raped 6 months ago but now 3 doctors have come back and said the injuries I sustained were self...

Hi, My psychologist lets me talk openly about my suicidal ideation and manages and monitors me well. She is a clinical trauma psychologist who runs the trauma unit for the NHS so expensive but very very good and has been crucial managing me during my crisis situations so there are people out...

Yes I know your right but it's not what I want, I just want the pain to stop. But thank you.

Thank you. Yes I have a clinical psychologist that I see weekly who is a specialist in woman, sexual abuse and ptsd/complex trauma. She is brilliant and my rock and who I spoke with tonight. I am very lucky to have someone like that. I just wish I felt more deserving and like my main mantra in...

i just cannot keep doing this anymore. My life is one big never ending spiral of shit. Basically my child has been put into Foster Care due to my suicidal ideation and the fact I have been stalked harassed and abused for 17+ years. The police read my diaries after I was raped that they...

I am so sorry to hear about your situation as it feels very similar to my own. Getting out or considering getting out is the hardest decision ever and...

Hi, I am fairly new to this, but I hear your pain so much and it really resonates with me.

Wow you are truly amazing. I have never been on one of these sites and it is like you totally get it and the answers you are suggesting are actually really helpful to hear. This illness is so hard to understand and the separation between what I feel rationally and intellectually are so...

Oh my gosh thank you so so much! There are so many things here that I never thought about doing and after a terrible nights sleep of severe nightmares some really good ways to get me through today. Really thank you. You also mentioned about something I could do in Court as my daughter is...