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Recent content by OneBloodyMoment

  1. O

    Numb.

    I'm with you, with one exception... my abuser. I have a lifetime of CPTSD after 4 years living daily in terror of physical and psycological abuse; I can't say as it would bother me one bit to know he was being crippled with PTSD of his own. I've been going thru a totally numb period as well...
  2. O

    What do you really need from your so/loved ones after an isolation period?

    It could be that he's angry with himself for bailing on that thing he knew was important for you. He's upset with himself and may fear you harbour a resentment over it, regardless how much you show him you don't. That's how I am after a period of isolation, especially with an SO. In my head...
  3. O

    Isolated myself for far too long and now feel lost and in despair

    I was reading thru another person's post regarding isolating and lonliness (mainly because I'm going thru the same thing myself rather intensely at this time) and I found myself almost replying (at ridiculously great length, which is why I abandoned it. Lol.) to say what @EveHarrington said so...
  4. O

    A Rarely Mentioned Phenomenon I Experience

    This sounds very much like the Hypervigilance I experience. It was the first symptom I remember having some 26 years ago. It's still with me and it feels like second nature. I am always "on guard", especially when I'm out of the home. I'm far more aware of my surroundings at all times than...
  5. O

    Guilt Getting In The Way Of Self Care

    I wish I had some wisdom to share, unfortunately I can only say that yes, I have this problem as well. I also find it very uncomfortable. Your post jumped out at me because this Guilt you're talking about is precisely why I found myself on this forum tonight. I feel like I'm drowning in the...
  6. O

    Opiate Withdrawals... Again

    I have, for 10 years now. I didn't go to a programme. One day I just became utterly, completely disgusted with myself and the way opiates (heroin at first, then morphine prescribed for post-cancer pain) had me living. Even though they were being prescribed for me by a doctor for physical pain I...
  7. O

    Ptsd Hurts

    I cut my mother out of my life. I had to, she was toxic in my life. She wasn't even the source of my childhood abuse, that was my stepfather. Long story short he almost killed me. I know you feel like the worst person in the world if you cut out family but believe me, that feeling can pass. It...
  8. O

    Can A Person Be Too Broken?

    My ex-wife told me I was "too broken", despite the fact that I supported her and our 3 kids and tried my damnedest to fight all my PTSD symptoms (from severe childhood abuse). I was pretty high functioning, never lashed out and wanted more than anything to be a good husband and father. But I was...
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