Recent content by pepper_e

PTSD, for me, has a theme of the unknown. So I seek places that are familiar, that are engaging, and yet distancing. For me, PTSD manifests itself in an alienating, distancing, self-loathing, craving for connection with a world that has 'moved on without me'. I am constantly drowning in a...

A mentor of mine, someone who has always been there for me, recently told me this: The further away you are, the easier it is to deal with. Well, it has been 2 years and I am on the other side of the planet from where my 'event' occurred, and it is not getting easier. My mentor does not...

I can't say for him, but I know in my own experiences the "hope-filled" words can irritate me because it becomes like "you don't get it" moment for me. Because all I can think about are the negative things in life. But I know what helps me is the "we" messages, the ones that reinforce that who...

Being a veteran with a similar story I can tell you this: Communicate, Communicate and COMMUNICATE. There are going to be times when he will be in your arms, but a million miles away. And other times when he will be the strongest man you have ever known, and crumbling inside. Set up ground...

I love the Boston "A's" not the team (if that's where they're from... not a sports guy) but the pronunciation "A's". Anyways Its great to have you here with us, I as well avoid alcohol and take medication. But I also write and browse forums reading and writing when and where I can. Come in chat...

Death may seem like a release because it easy. I have tried to kill myself three times since my event. The first two were stopped by a family member. The third I came close, and before the icy grip of death clutched me, to never release again, I awoke and realized something. Life truly is worth...

Thank you, everyone, for the warm and delightful welcome. Your words are encouraging and uplifting.

Thank you for your kind words, and I am glad to hear that you and your man are on the same road. It is always comforting to see fellow travelers on the roads we take in life. Writing may be a huge help, but so far I have just started to crawl. I have yet to get my legs under me and run away...

My two cents: I think it's a mindset issue here one person may feel they have "survived" something so they identify with that word. Some people may view it completely different and see themselves as the "victim" of a crime and identify themselves that way. Personally hypervigilant seems mildly...

Hello, and salutations. I guess it goes without saying that I have PTSD, why else would I be here. I spent years fighting it the only way I knew how, to power through it with reckless, directionless intent. I hurt people along the way, and destroyed myself. I spent time in the highest of highs...

I know (as a twitcher) that I do it right before I fall asleep, but up until now I had no idea I did it in my sleep I had to ask if I did. I can honestly say I had no idea, and I am sorry for this, I am actually apologizing as I am typing this to my SO. I have recently started my own path down...