Recent content by Placebo

My shrink have me a benzo. And tonight will be the third night I am taking it. What do you think about it?

My life

I totally get it. I said that about aa. I was better than those losers. one of two is always good to start. It is a self defense mechanism to separate ourselves and place ourselves above others. Perhaps the alanon group in particular was victim oriented. But, no one is a loser they are just...

Thank you for such eloquently spoken words. You have an amazing writing talent and beautiful explanation. That most likely sounds about right. I am looking for kindred spirits.

I have been tortured, and yes you do help. And, yes you do help. I read some of your story on a post. It helped me feel better. A lot better. What I read was torture and I felt an overwhelming compassion that took the place of my pain. That was just a small part of your story. I was looking at...

Maybe. But I don't enjoy it. And most of the time I have tons of compassion, but it makes the pain stop. I just called the RCS line and sounded like a crazy person. When it hurts to much to quick to sharp that happens. The pain splays me mentally. It's been a few years now after the last "f*ck...

I don't know if this is healthy, and it's only been about a year, but knowing others have suffered, the same, more, or different than me seems to sooth me. When I read about other survivors with details of their trauma, and even if they are not doing good after, it soothes me. I feel calm, and...

No I think I am totally dumping all my sh*t in this site. Anytime it hurts I have started summoning here after I missed two day of work and had to call Rape Counseling Services' emergency line a bunch for a few weeks it calmed down but was still intense and deeply disturbing feelings and...

I think about my trauma so much. It was way better for a long time then I had flashback and said something of facebook after a surgery and got seriously abused by sick people the f*cks who do this with power and money use to hurt ones who may talk. Anyway, that is not important for this...

How I know for a fact is I lived through it. The news is triggering me badly that is correct. I am sorry but you do not have the right to say I did not live trough this with the same people. I just had more than Epstein around. I know for a fact as one of the victims dear. I do need a...

No and I need one. I am on a waiting list to get into Rape Services Counseling, and I don't know how long that will take. I need therapy obviously, and that is the only resource I have at this moment. I have medicare and they have few if any options where I live for help.

I hide it when I cry in the office. I hide it very well and try very hard to, but some days I break down and cry because of PTSD. I go in the bathroom or cry at my desk. I can't help it. It is the only thing today that made the psychical pain in the back of my chest stop hurting and it hurt so...

Right now its in back of my chest and it hurts badly. I wan't to cry but deep breaths is all I can do at work. Excruciating pain has been their from 17-now. I wasn't in excruciating pain in my 30's for a short while, but they tortured me again so it's back. I didn't start hearing voices though...

You are beautiful and I would like to thank you for it. I am writing the victims of Epstein today and telling them they had no choice honestly and that they are very much loved in the world. That they can help so many victims and already have. I am working 60 hours a week for 3 weeks more only...

I had an odd form of.dissociation that caused me to hear voices for over a decade because of childhood abuse and then outside home abuse because of underage nonsconsnsual pornography and bad man hurting me as a teenager. They have raped and pushed a lot of women in to suicide, a lot. I worked...