Recent content by questionsaboutrel

Thank you, I know that. My parents are incredibly loving and kind. My husband has started to lash out in terrible ways to them too, as part of his tornado, and they keep being supportive of me even with their own hurt feelings towards him. My father was willing to put himself in jeopardy to make...

Thanks all. I apologize if my post has made it seem like I thought getting back together was an option - I know it isn’t. This has to be over, not only for me but for my family. I also know PTSD cannot be an excuse for abusing one’s partner. I guess just that the shock of it all is getting to...

I am totally in knots. My husband and I just got married two months ago. Literally from the day we married, it’s like a switch flipped and the verbal and emotionally abusive behavior ramped up intensely. He just had no boundaries anymore. It’s funny, I had a comment on a PTSD supporter group I’m...

You are right. Sometimes small victories are important. I’m stewing and anxious over my guy’s fight with me last night, but I had a thought suddenly about progress... last night after starting to fight with me, he told me to go sleep in the guest bedroom. I went up there immediately and he...

No, I really would worry about trying to do a repair on the house without his express permission. I think that would probably make things worse.

Hi all, I have posted before about issues with my PTSD guy. Over time, we know things can get rough but have progressed enough to move in together - into the house he owns - and we just got a new puppy (he already had one from before we met). He's been under additional stress loads from life...

Does anyone else get frustrated by momentum moving backwards? My guy had an explosive fall with me, and the ups and downs were brutal. We had a particularly painful break around Thanksgiving. I had been totally trying to ignore him, but he asked me to come over late one night. The...

Yes, I feel this way too. I sometimes feel like I have a hard time discerning what are actually logical differences between us just because we come from somewhat "different" worlds (for example, he's more conservative and I'm more liberal) and what is just totally irrational nonsense. I think a...

This is a great strategy. I really like your emphasis on not texting about something heavy. I try to think about "safe topics" to text my guy when I am unsure whether he wants to continue speaking that both A) Indicate my interest and B) don't put too much on him to explain himself or open up...

I know that my combat-related PTSD partner has no tolerance for cheating. He has told me flat out that if he was really interested in someone else, his relationship is over with me, period. Even in our on/off times when we've been officially "not together" due to isolation or fights or what have...

For mine - it's frustrating that compared to other relationships, I feel like we definitely won't have sex unless he initiates. Otherwise, he is definitely not in the "mood." I do think PTSD is a factor in this, since from the stories he has told me, he was quite a player in earlier days... Or...

You might get cut off. You might want to think of a way to ask to see him in which him needing space isn't a problem -- like saying, "If you're not ready to see me yet, you can just not reply." That may be helpful - I've seen PTSD sufferers on here describing anxiety about replying if someone is...

Hi Newtoptsd, My situation is very similar to yours. When I met my boyfriend, he agreed to be in a committed relationship relatively quickly (2 or 3 weeks of seeing each other) and we chugged along for nearly a year pretty well, albeit with outbursts and random day-long "breakups" (I now...

Sometimes he reacts ok, sometimes badly. I find that firm, clear choices are helpful. For example, all the times my SO has said he's "done" with me but then still wants to engage in a fight, I clearly create two choices -- either you are ready to talk and you will be respectful, or you need...

You know, I don't know since I am definitely suffering from this now - today I was told I was "blocked" permanently, which is exactly what he told me a week ago (he never actually blocked me last time). What I feel like helps with the anger is being firm about what you need and not rolling over...