Recent content by smyh

My primary contact is my husband, who has trouble understanding what it's like to go through depression and all that for prolonged lengths. It is hard to explain everything to him or I am too ashamed of it. My secondary contact doesn't quite see how my flashbacks are terrifying me nor has he...

I have noticed lately that I am pulling back from people and from self care activities. I feel like when I try to reach out that I am not taken seriously. My energy is too low to want to do much of anything. I'm struggling just to get out of beds some mornings. So I am stuck mostly with my...

I had my first taste of EMDR therapy yesterday. I added more detail to my therapist over my assault. The man choked and smothered me, which was always a phobia of mine to begin with. The memory of it and talking about it gave me that feeling of being suffocated. I didn't realize how bad that...

I keep going to this dark little place in my mind where I just don't have the energy to deal with anything anymore. I have a feeling that people are tired of hearing that from me in my family, so I don't want to talk about it at home. It feels so much easier to just lie and say I will be okay...

All the time.

I always told myself I would never let it happen to me again. So I feel like I let myself down. I know that whenever he gets out of jail, he will be tracking me down

This sounds like the pattern of an abusive relationship. In the end, he will only get help when he really wants it. You need to focus on what is best for you. You deserve to be treated with love and respect. In my opinion, staying with him just keeps you in a toxic and potentially dangerous...

I had been raped by a man who was supposed to be my friend in my dorm in 2008. It was a very complicated thing and was an international issue. I made a report and went through the court process from 2009 to 2013. In the end he got two years probation. I still haven't healed from all that...

It's one of those things that I am scared of failing. I don't think I could handle any more

There is a lot I have to address to take care of myself. I am scared to move forward

My hope is to start airing out my dirty laundry. I keep things bottled in too much and my husband doesn't quite understand all this

Yes, I become almost obsessed with working. However I am finding I am stretching myself too thin because I don't want to address my problems

I had an official diagnosis in January while placed in a mental health hospital after having uncontrollable suicidal thoughts. I have always suffered from depression, but got ptsd after being raped in my dorm room by a friend in 2008. This past December I saw a man who looked very much like...