Recent content by StellaBlue

There's a lot of truth in what you say. I'm not sure flippant is the right term - but yes, I think I sometimes minimize the benefits I've received. I have a lot of distrust of the entire 'mental health' system (not unfounded) which leads to ambivalence about therapy in general. I've decided...

The first time I tried to find a trauma therapist (maybe 4 or 5 years ago), I found woman that did somatic experiencing and came highly recommended. After an hour long intake session, she told me I wasn't stable enough to do it and that I should work on getting stable with the guy I see now ...

Does anyone really "want" to do trauma therapy? I suppose the real question is - Is it time to do trauma therapy (again)? I'm going to put on my whiney hat for a second, stomp my feet and say I DONT WANNA DO IT! IT'S HARD AND IT SUCKS AND HOW MANY TIMES TO I HAVE TO KEEP CIRCLING THROUGH...

I have had (and still do have, to some extent) this. I think "being seen" means being open to being hurt - so not being seen is safer. I used to have this kind of childlike magical thing where "If I can't see you, you can't see me" - so I wouldn't wear my glasses places, or I'd keep my head...

I have considered taking a break. I think I'm at a point where I'd manage fine. There are still a couple of things I'd like help with. I'm not sure that therapy is the place to get that help, but I'm not sure what alternatives there are - I'm definitely exploring this. Yes. The problem, as...

It's been a while since I've posted, although I drop in pretty regularly to see how folks are doing and to pick up advice here and there. I've been amazingly stable over the past couple of years - and I'm absolutely amazed at how I've weathered the last year of losses (my father, two pets and a...

I had a similar experience several years ago - only I live on the line between two counties - so two sets of police and two sets of medics (plus a firetruck) - all very confused about who had jurisdiction. I did manage to get them to leave - that time. The second time (over a year later), it...

Another "hospital mom" here - although after NICU, not critical care - just 10 surgeries from birth to age 2 (I worry about him having PTSD along with me). I don't know you or your doctor, but I find it a bit irritating that he is slapping a potential label of PTSD on you without recognizing...

Interesting thread. I can relate to a lot of the comments so far. Currently, though, I'm paying attention to what's in my Control versus Out of My Control. I've never viewed myself as a "control freak" but I'm starting to pay attention to how I tend to spiral when unexpected things happen -...

I lived with constant suicide ideation for years - we're talking constant from age 14 to 54 - it's not been an issue for almost 2 years now (and I feel - blessed). My current therapist, who I've seen for 5-6 years (on and off) has been a rock throughout all of it. After about a year of seeing...

This [[BIG ARROW POINTING UPWARDS]] A couple of years ago, my therapist said something that felt very invalidating. And, because we were talking about a situation that didn't involve the past, but rather a current situation, it threw me into a huge vortex - what's his sh*t, what's my sh*t...

I'm sorry your symptoms have returned @CourageofSnow. I got triggered last week - full blown panic attack and the subsequent return of some of my symptoms (which I think may actually be the "hangover" from the panic attack). Regarding scents and grounding - I worked with a somatic...

Ha! This happened to me as well. Sleep eating. And I was obviously a pig about it because I'd wake up with dried food all over my night clothes, dirty dishes all over the house. It was before they changed the warnings on the label and my shrink was like "hmmmm...that's very odd". I stopped...

Please tell me Hamsters are some sort of candy and not the furry rodents...

Yeah - I tend to put people I like or admire on a pedestal. I also tend to be highly critical of my own flaws...so it's something I'm definitely aware of and consciously working on. True.