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Literally everything. There's nothing in my life that isn't awful. If I don't die here and make it to the end of my contract then I will be homeless, broke and unemployed. My narcissistic ex-wife is trying to stop me having contact with the kids and I can't afford a solicitor. I'm almost...

The other options all look even worse. I don't want to live a life worse than the shitshow I already have.

Except when it is.

No. There is no escape. Things just get worse by the day. There's only one way out.

Reasons. They sound stupid. I wanted an adventure, you know? My last job lacked the element of danger that my various 'careers' have usually had and I was bored. I had visions of action and excitement and maybe even romance. I wanted money so I could afford somewhere to live. I finally got my...

What it says. I came here for a lot of reasons, one being to draw a line under a life of constant misery and repeated failure. I had hoped this would be a new beginning or a decent ending, but it's shaping up to be neither. There's nothing to go back to and nowhere to go from here. There are...

I'm probably never going 'home'.

I used to have that. Turned out it wasn't me; the house was just haunted.

Hello?

In my teens and twenties I was haunted by a recurring series of nightmares. Without going into too much detail, they seemed to show changes in the village where I lived and events in my life. Over the years, more and more of the changes I dreamed about have actually happened- structures built...

Terrible. I sweated so much that I genuinely woke up and thought someone had dumped water on me.

Lonely. We've been pulled out of the line to rest in some tiny village in the arse end of nowhere. There's no nightlife and most of the guys just want to sleep. Nobody at home is answering my messages. I had a silly dream that I might have some kind of Casablanca-style romance over here. No...

I want to go home, but home doesn't exist anymore.

10046 steps. A bit short of my daily goal of 13000, but circumstances rather limit my freedom of movement these days.

In the forest. Or sitting on the sofa with my kids, drinking tea and watching a film.

I know this is kind of an old thread, but it caught my eye. I went through some stuff as a kid that I didn't feel able to share with my parents, so I ended up accepting that it was part of my life and nobody was coming to save me. It was always like that from then on; things just conatantly got...

I don't know. P art of my wants to go home. I'm homesick and I miss my children. A friend was wounded today and I'm upset and angry and frightened. A bigger part of me, though, is oddly calm about the fact that I might be here for a long time. I feel comfortable here, among the death and...

A slice of cold pizza and a cup of tea.

I literally just finished watching Sharpe's Rifles on YouTube. Still as good as it ever was.

We have a few feral cats and dogs running around here that the guys like to feed. Wildlife-wise, I only really saw sparrows today. I find it odd that they have sparrows here, even though I know I should have expected it; I feed sparrows in my garden at home, so they feel like they should be a...

We literally invented Hallowe'en, so it's quite a big deal where I come from. I'm a druid, though, so I celebrate it as its old self, Samhain. Which is functionally the same as most other people, but with a midnight bonfire and some chanting on top of a hill. I wasn't able to celebrate with my...