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    A series of unfortunate events?

    Not really sure where to begin here. Do I begin at the beginning, the middle, or the present? Maybe what is in my head at the time but my head is such a mess lately. I find myself thinking of things I haven't of in a long time. Maybe a short history to start? I think I forget things that...
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    Childhood Fooling myself?

    So my earliest trauma I think happened when I was five I think. There have been many traumatic events in my life so when I am trying to figure out which trauma did the most damage I am confused. I have spent a lot of my life believing it all wasn't that bad. That I had dealt with my earliest...
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    Dom Violence Need to put thia in writing ao my head doesn't screw with memory of it.

    So I have been trying to figure out how to set a boundary for my son asking his father for things and his Dad just showing up but I hadn't quite figured it out yet. On Thursday my son's father emails me to attack me over our son's requests for food two nights this week. I responded back that...
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    Dom Violence Son is mad i left abusive father

    I am not really sure how to handle this. I know I feel like I can't win here. My son asks me today why I left Dad. I told him I don't know how to explain but then reverted to Dad's anger since this is something he knows about. He said that Dad told him I left because of a fight and he told me...
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    Am i dissociating?

    My earliest memory is of coming like out of a stupor. I know I wasn't asleep but I don't know if I went inside my head or where exactly my mind was. I just remembering coming out of it as my abuser finished up with me. And then I buried that memory until I realized something very wrong had...
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    Dom Violence Fear but feel like people think it's irrational

    So I have never been hit. Maybe pushed but no not hit. I have been raged over. Told by one ex that he wanted to hit me and most recently he was going to kill me. Threatened with cops, cps and courts repeatedly by multiple exes. Watched on ex cut up his arms. Another threw things around and...
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    Humor?

    So I am trying cope using humor with the fact that my brain doesn't seem to be functioning the way it should be, so here it goes: Sometimes it feels like my brain is running Windows '98 and I just get that blue screen of death telling me , "Reality has just performed an illegal operation." You...
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    Just need to get this out.

    So I have only admitted this to one person and I really didn't go into detail. Certain events recently on the National Stage and well people's behavior around them have been traumatic for me. I can look and realize I am being triggered all over the place but when it began I didn't really...
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    Undiagnosed What is going on? csa, rape, abuse, & others. doesn't seem like it counts as trauma.

    Hi, I have not been diagnosed. Certain things have been leading me to question whether I have ptsd, like people actually suggesting I have. I am not the same person I was even two years ago. I am lost, full of shame and paralyzed about making decisions and taking action. I am scared all the...
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