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Everything went okay. Surgery was without complications and I’m recovering at home with some really strong meds including a large ball pump that is attached into my abdominal area with a tube and a dial that I have control over, for pain meds and hydration to the area. My emotions are all over...

Today’s the day. I’m terrified. My therapist did send me a reminder email to do self flash emdr for calming and to go outside. I’ve done tapping as well. Will be leaving soon. I’m mostly worried about my blood pressure. I normally have decent blood pressure but it was 167 over 86 at the...

Thank you. I’m trying to be patient. I want it over with. I’ve been bleeding daily for a very long time and it’s wearing on me. He told me that I have endometriosis, adenomyosis, and my ovarian cyst has doubled in size over the last 3 months. So, I’m planning for recovery being...

@DharmaGirl …. It was rough. Emailed my therapist, but she couldn’t do a phone call. I reached out to a couple of friends to make sure what happened was medically justified, and not a creepy unnecessary painful thing. Finally, had therapy today and we talked about surgeon personalities and...

Trans-vaginal Ultrasound…. At this stage of my healing, I didn’t realize that it would have this profound of an impact on me. 😬

Cat on lap.

I met the surgeon and really liked him. My Appointment was in his office. He was really funny and answered all of my questions. Ptsd is in my chart and I talked to both him and his nurse about my meds. I feel safe with him in regards to this surgery, I think. I guess next week’s ultrasound...

Off topic, Can you take strong anti-inflammatory drugs? The only way I’ve gotten better when my back goes out is extreme anti-inflammatory meds in addition to prednisone (which makes me crazy). They say you can take Tylenol and Ibuprofen at the same time as well. (Not sure on dosage). I’d...

You can ask your T to go back to taps. Too much intensity can certainly throw a person over the edge!

That is how I used to do therapy. Now we butterfly tap. I thought the tappers were more intense as well, but it all seems to process the same. I’m finding the subject manner is what really affects it the most.

I’ll probably dissociate. I just don’t think he would be able to see the things he needs to see considering the cervix would be closed. However, the appointment will be allotted more time, so maybe that is the goal. It’s weird with “elective” surgery. I’ve had 5 different doctors say this is...

I’m scheduled to have a hysterectomy in a little over a month. My doctor wants a different/better surgeon to do the robotic surgery because he said that I have a difficult case. Scar tissue attaching my uterus to my abdominal wall or something like that. I’m a little panicked because I don’t...

Yes. My therapist recommends that I not be still or sleep immediately after emdr. On my list we have: go outside, try a walk, clean, paint, music, short bursts of exercise. After doing that, I can then take my nap or whatever. I was having too many problems when I froze into a nap or my...

My therapist gave up touch during the pandemic and it had been such a huge part of my therapy. (Learning hugs). I missed them. I thought she would bring it back, I asked her about it and she said that she isn’t. This led to a huge breakdown for me. We did a session on it and I cried through...

My therapist would usually have some sort of mildly triggering conversation with me about the target.

I trust that my therapist is human and imperfect. I trust that she is a really good therapist and knows what she is doing, for the most part. I love her. There are so many parts of me that feel differently about her, but she is a guide as we work together in my healing. It has taken me 5...

Out of curiosity, do you have family or spousal support? If so, communicate this with them. My daughter spent most of a semester pretending that she was going to class and okay. Eventually, I knew she wasn’t, but it cost her a lot of money and time that she could have been healing. We would...

@hithere my earliest “shiny” memory was of the happy memory with a friend and friendly man from the woods joining our play in the creek. This led to the absolute worst trauma that I had—if I even had it. Blocked it out for many years, but a lot of bad ptsd events seemed to occur after the...

I’m coming off of a very stressful journey of possible cancer (PTS feelings) that has now turned into a “let’s keep watch on the nodule.” Had a therapy rupture, that I thought was resolved and T vacation tossed in there too. When she came back, our meeting was fine. I left ok. Then, I woke...

@PTSDisaster I was really hoping this drug would help, but my pdoc knew this would happen. (I had insisted on trying the drug). My anxiety started to increase in that first week and increased with dose. I thought it was just me having really bad anxiety and triggers, but some of that stuff...

The med made my anxiety spike including added high blood pressure. I normally have excellent or low blood pressure.

@joeylittle I never thought about it that way. What you said about isolation explains a lot!

The stranger things stuff made sense to me. So did Moon Knight. That was dealing with DID. I don’t have DID, but my work in emdr brings up parts. The storyline had quite a bit of self abandonment and protective parts explored. My husband was confused out of his mind and I’m sitting there...

@Sweetpea76 You basically just described my husband/supporter. I wish that my self preservation wasn’t so extreme at times. However, I’m finding that everyone is messed up in their own special way. Even the healthy relationship people,

I hope that you don’t consider the sexual abuse as a “romantic” thing. I know it can all get confusing though. You probably loved your brother, but what he did was not okay. Hopefully, a healthy relationship with yourself and friends will come first.