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I think I'm just done feeling like this. 4 months of therapy and all I can do is close my eyes without panic. (I wasn't able to close my eyes in the beginning, sometimes I still can't). I'm flooded with intrusive thoughts. I feel like dissociative crap. I'm just so done. I really don't care...

I can't ever quite describe how I feel. Maybe overwhelmed and exhausted. Maybe like my head is a balloon and ready to explode. I'm frustrated that I have ptsd. I want to argue that I couldn't possibly have this diagnosis yet I meeting more criteria needed for the diagnosis. But I was still...

my mind is slowed down yet thoughts seem to be running at hyper speed i'm thinking omg, omg, omg why the h*** did i share what i shared last week in session i can't breathe now i can't concentrate i want to fade away i want to hide but i want to get better i want to be me and have my life back...

I don't know what to say. In therapy I still can't talk about what happened. I get there and just freeze...I always plan on speaking but the words won't come out. I hate this diagnosis. I want to be myself again, whoever she is now. I want to be able to eat, breathe, close my eyes and...