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Can you do the peace corp without a college degree these days? Trust me.. I'm looking all over. I have to family or friends to go to. And no money.

For sure. Cooperate feels safer. I appreciate the imput! I've been all over the road exploring any new kind of job opportunity I can. Jobs are so competitive in this city I'm in, I'm not used to it. And I do examine myself. And I overthink it to.

That breaks my heart to hear!! I'm sending you hugs if you'll have them. I don't have have any advice, but know that you're not alone. I don't remember most of my traumas, and in extreme times of stress I won't remember my entire childhood. My mom used to rape me and had a sick fascination...

Hurray!!! :inlove:

@WillyKat im sure that's exactly it. It's really great to have that written out so plainly <3 thanks!! I try to just keep my head down and get home too and pray no one triggers me. But what a sad way to live!

It's not an exchange. It's me being smiley and chatty and polite in a cold city. But sticking to small talk with no touching or not even wearing anything showing too much while flaunting my boyfriend. You seriously have no right. And you sound jaded and triggery. So please take a break from...

No, I'm just actually good at reading people. Promise. It's my biggest non emotionally based obsession. Like a hobby. It's like, you're looking at this huge beautiful painting. Normal bi standards can walk by and can observe the simple beauty or mistakes. But if you stand there trying to...

That's all I've ever done and it gets me into trouble every time.

It would be a bad thing because I have to make money or I'm on the streets. I have no friends or family to fall back on. And it doesn't matter anyway. The next business will be the same way.

You get a good look at your coworkers until you start working with them. Business owners are very good at putting on faces. If they didn't, they wouldn't have a business. So I feel like it's impossible. And I feel like the more I figure this shit out, the more likely I am to go off the grid.

I don't cave either. People mistake my kindness for flirting all the time. I just come from a different culture. And I think that's my temporary job security right there. If I were to ice queen that shit I'd be gone so much faster.

It's just learning to read people @The Albatross. It's experience and learning from it. I took the job because people are people and it seemed all right. Didn't meet my coworkers until I started. But I'm getting to the point where I'm not sure if there's any kind hearted business owners out there.

@The Albatross ive just gone through too many jobs in the past few years. You start to notice this type of fear in people's faces. My last job, they kept a secret gossip blog about all of the workers plus paid us with counter fit money now and again. So I picked the most calm unpopular coffee...

So I feel like I can't find a job without detecting a snake in the grass. Some crooked som bitch that decides you're a threat at some point and tries to manipulate the boss who's also crooked. Are business owners always like this? Is it like chess? Should I always be strategic in finding the...

Right?? @Cj77 Good for you!! I hate being muzzled from the get go then having to come out of it. But what I hate more is that I let him muzzle me. That's the part that blows my mind.

Thanks so much @BlueDream :inlove: wishing you a wonderful day as well!!

Oh escape route, you and I are the oldest of friends! Though, I'm never happy to see you. Lol I'm hoping I won't need it, but it's looking like I will. I'm calling around trying to get a job over seas. I gave my man an altumatum last night. The verbal abuse has to stop, or I'm out of here...

There's an app for that?? Lol. @Flossy how funny and convenient!! Yeah.. I can tell. All I tried to do last night is to not start cooking something he wanted me to and he started ignoring me. I tried to talk about myself and he "politely" stopped me.

Thanks @Flossy <3 I think I'm with a narsisist now and am hoping to come up with the funds to leave(unless proven wrong). I'm learning how to cut off any narsisistic supply and am looking into teaching English over seas!

I looked that guy up!! Totally creepy. You can tell he used to be like that .. If he's not just become the greatest narc of all. Lol

@ground crew @FridayJones @Chava thanks so much for sharing!! It's nice to hear that I'm not the only one <3

@StellaBlue .. Sorry that wasn't clear.. I don't keep more stuff than what fits in a backpack. I was hoping to connect with someone else that does that too!

Does anyone else experience extreme minimalism as a side effect of PTSD? If you do, I would really love to hear about it.

@Flossy i don't have that example in my life. Im still trying to find someone who loves me well.

That's intense @Cashew !!! Quite the thing to think about.