Search results

Hi, whiteraven. Sending you safe hugs. ? I'm looking forward to the day when you find something to look forward to, whiteraven.

Sounds like maybe he's isolating to prevent himself from lashing-out at you. I would consider it an improvement, too. Still, once he initiates contact again, it might be worth it for you to discuss your feelings again. Maybe even come up with some sort of agreement about how to handle things...

Yeah, I get it. It is tough to find all three. I drive over 3 hours total to see my psychologist for a 45 minute session, but it's worth it to me. But 4 hours one way is not practical on any level; so, I get it. You're welcome. You've been through enough junk, just want to be sure you find...

That's unfortunate, but makes sense with Covid-19. Are the online providers experienced with CSA, childhood trauma, or sexual assault in any way? Only asking, because not all professionals are familiar with the specifics needed to help people like us. Don't want you to end-up with an...

Yes, it most certainly is possible for you to just feel the memory. Yes, that is a body memory. I'm struggling with terrible body memories myself, at the moment. For me, the body memories usually coincide with the emergence of new details, or new memories altogether. I understand how...

I've been on Prazosin for almost a week, and it is helping. My doctor started me at 1 mg. I wasn’t having/remembering nightmares. However, I was still having a difficult time falling asleep. He increased the dose to 2 mg. This increase did help me to fall asleep faster. So, even though I'm...

A day where I have no reason to cry. Unless, of coarse, they are happy tears. Would love to be able to cry me some happy tears.

My big flat-screen t.v. is broken. Of course it waited until we were in the middle of a pandemic. Now, I have to watch everything on my laptop or phone. Very first world problem, I know.

I can't speak to your sufferer's state of mind, but I can share my reasons for isolating... I know that when I isolate it is usually because I am completely overwhelmed. Sometimes, I just don't want to risk the potential that I will harm my relationships, so I avoid when I'm emotionally raw or...

Take my advice for what it's worth... I have found that taking back an ex- never works. The same sh*t that separated you the first time will (eventually) rear its ugly head. Plus, like you mentioned you will have mega-trust issues. Plus, in my experience, the second break-up is more...

Beautiful poetry. I especially love the alternate ending. Go Munchkins! Love this poem. I'm a bit geeky, too, so... ? And yes, it would be nice if we could service our brains like a computer. In a way though, we can by getting therapy, processing the trauma, and learning new skills. It...

Hi, GuyBloke. I'm sorry to hear that you are not sleeping well. Obsessing over the details, and trying to remember everything is common. For example, my left shoe fell off my foot during an attack, and I can't for the life of me remember how it got back on my foot. Why this is something I...

Hi, 8888. Here are some hugs. ? ????

Hi, Changing4Best. Here are some hugs. ?????????????? I hope they help.☺

My psychiatrist uses doxy, as well. My psychologist simply calls me on the phone.

Also, I freeze. I do it, because as a child three types of senerios took place: 1. brutal, over-powering violence = nervous system deploys freeze reponse (play-dead) to save your life. 2. I was groomed - rewarded for being still (not wiggling), and cooperating with my abusers. 3. I was...

Yes, that's true, too. Thanks, Ronin. They aren't mutually exclusive, though. I do know that I don't want to be abused, or like it, or any of that kind of thing, because I don't stick around for more violence. I leave, but it's always after something has happened. When I do get those creepy...

Yeah, I get that too. There's so much junk. That's why my psychologist is helping me to unload it all first, and process it. Deep-down I know it keeps happening because on some level I feel I deserve it. Even though I know, I don't. Again my intellectual mind knows the truth. But I can't...

Yes. I think for most people, the majority of the time, the world is a safe place. I feel as though all of the abuse and violence inflicted upon me as a child either damaged my brain so badly, or I'm simply evil, that I'm beyond help.

Hi, Ronin. You are very kind with your suggestions, which are good suggestions to be sure. But I've been studying this stuff since I graduated high school. I've presented at conferences. (God, I pray none of my colleagues read this and figure me out). I've got the head knowledge, and the...

Your description of getting worse seems to miss the point that I lost consciousness. I don't think it can get too much worse than being seconds from death. Most likely, everyone is right, I missed signs that he was capable of this. My problem is I don't know how to see these signs. I've been...

I agree with you. It was intimate partner violence. I left, because I knew if he did it once, he could do it again. I knew I would never be able to trust him again. The thing that confuses me is that he was never rough or violent before. Everything I read says that abusers start small and...

Maybe you missed the part where we were friends, long before dating. My family were not going to help me post-op & getting nursing care was too expensive. I was a young adult and this was medically urgent surgery that I needed. I initiated opening-up, because we were becoming increasingly...

I think feeling like an imposter is typical, when you've pushed-down those memories and tried to disconnect yourself from the reality of what happened. The important thing to remember is that you are not an imposter. I am glad you plan on speaking to a therapist. It will be difficult at...

I haven’t had enough sleep to explain our relationship in great detail but here it is in a nutshell: 1. We were co-workers for 6 months 2. We developed a friendship months 6-15ish 3. He asked me out after knowing each other for almost 1.5 years; I liked him; he was kind to me, coworkers...