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Coming from the supporter side, yup, this happens. He even told me that he realized he was triggered, and that I did not mean to be hurtful or bad or negative, but that the "damage was done," and I was no longer safe. This the day after (literally) reassuring me that he loved me, and if we loved...

Until it comes from the horse's mouth (or horse's ass....?), it isn't "said." Talking to someone else is just that - talking. Unfortunately, not enough people understand that. "I told so-and-so, so it's as good as telling you." Yeah no. HOWEVER, also just disappearing, going no contact, when...

@Pippi427 The letter writing thing was hugely cathartic for me when my sufferer broke up with me. I wrote him letters of all the crap I couldn't actually tell him. And then I didn't send them. It was the venting I needed, whether he learned of it or heard it or not. There were only 2 letters I...

This is what some of us are not receiving. My own sufferer told me that once he has a bad opinion of someone, there is no turning back, and they can't convince him otherwise (which, yes, coping skill based on being manipulated in the past). I can live with that. Unfortunately, my sufferer was...

My absolute hard boundary is physical violence directed towards me or another living thing (other than, say, insects ?). I grew up with a door slammer and thrower (my dad), and he never directed it at someone else, human or animal, but it was terrifying enough. I'm also inclined to not tolerate...

She already HAS left you. She isn't threatening to leave, she HAS LEFT. She's just jerking you along. Block her texts. Seriously. Almost every carrier has the ability to block texts and calls - you might have to log in to their website, but it can be done. I know most phones have text...

I can only speak to my own experience with my sufferer. He has cPTSD due to neglect and abuse throughout his childhood, and a second diagnosis of PTSD from a work-related injury. I haven't been too active on here of late, but my story is on this site, if you're curious for more of the...

My sufferer has the hypervigilance and paranoia as well - and it's definitely a result of the anxiety and PTSD. He uses a cane now, and got a handicap placard for his car, and is convinced people are looking at him and judging him for taking a handicap space. And judging him for needing a cane...

Consider this entire thread "liked" and "ditto'd." It hurts like hell now. It will get better. You have strength in you, and with time and distance you'll be able to hear your own voice again.

I apologize if this comes across as ranty and/or bitter, but sometimes something is said that just...pisses me right off. There's a line we, as supporters, have to walk - are we supposed to have these huge issues in our lives (because, yes, our sufferers are part of our lives, and what they are...

My ex and I chat on an IM program daily, on and off throughout the day, sending each other items funny and light. I'm the first person he tells when the shit hits the fan. We go out to dinner about every other week or so. We do some shopping, like at IKEA or a local Asian grocery, together. A...

I'm an introvert, and a titch agoraphobic (though that's lessened to almost non-existence as my anxiety and depression have gotten under control). I'm also an only child. When my sufferer was working overnight, it was almost perfect - I had alone time, we had together time. Once I got a part...

Escapism fantasies - My sufferer had been harboring them to varying degrees over the last year. First he wanted to move to Japan. Then it morphed to just "travel, see some people up north and back east." Then he went to his step-mom's for Thanksgiving. Then he talked about moving where she (and...

My sufferer's family...Had I known then what I know now, I never, EVER would have encouraged him to "get along" with them, for the sake of his kids. But, his kids have also thanked me for encouraging him to create relationships with them (the kids). So...yeah. His mom? Can go straight to hell...

Our couples counseling was probably the worst thing we could have done, when it comes to "saving" our marriage; but, it was the best thing when it came to saving myself. Without my sufferer dealing with his stuff (IE being in therapy to at least DEVELOP tools), he just does not have the tools...

Yes, conflict is a huge trigger for a lot of folks, I imagine. Even for me, a non-PTSD sufferer (but who did have an emotionally abusive childhood, even if it wasn't entirely intentional), conflict is a trigger, and part of my OWN issues is that I tend to back down and try to appease at the...

So familiar! I very much want to take responsibility for my own shit. If I'm unintentionally hurting someone, I want to know so I can stop whatever it is I'm doing to hurt them. Misinterpreting something? Tell me so I can understand! But then, when you start dealing with actual triggers, that I...

So so many times we had (and sometimes continue to have) conversations like this. I end up bewildered, wondering where THAT conversation came from, because we clearly weren't having the same conversation. To be honest, I'm still recovering from this, because for a long time he had convinced me...

Yup. That's the emotional merry-go-round I try to stifle. "But if he'd get therapy, there'd be hope!" But he's not in therapy, probably never will be, so there is no hope for my sufferer and I. So, I just get on board a little more each day that we're done being a couple, and that in reality, he...

My sufferer went from "I love you, I want you, I am so attracted to you," one week in therapy to "I am on the verge of hating you, you are not worth it to me to keep this up." And MY big trigger? Not being "worth" enough to someone. So yeah. Say the one thing that will push us away. It happens...

My sufferer acts as if we weren't married, hadn't been together for 8ish years. He'll try to tell me stories ABOUT US. It's maddening. And sad. When he does stuff like that, I generally end up crying after I leave whatever we were doing. He tells people our splitting up was a "friendly and...

When we'd go out with both my sufferer and my dad...my mom and I knew to take the seats without a view of the restaurant. My dad was never diagnosed (that I know of), but the more I learn, the more I'm convinced he had PTSD as well. Which explains why I never questioned my hubby's behavior, even...

Oh man. Lights and curtains were a constant battle with my sufferer, and I had no idea why - his instinct is to turn on a light as soon as it starts getting dim in a room. And yup, I'm a "turn the lights off if you're not in the room!" person. I eventually just gave up because, really, it's not...

My sufferer has taken to ordering his groceries from a local store. He tells them online what he wants, they pick the order, he goes to pick them up, they load his car. On one hand, it's great for those days he's in pain. On the other? He knows it's a way for him to avoid the outside world. But...

This has been my struggle, too. My sufferer even asked me to not pay attention to his actions, but listen to his words, when he tells me what he wants out of life, how he feels about me, etc (SHOULDA BEEN A RED FLAAAAAG). His words told me he wanted me in his life, he loved me, he liked the...