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@Oldguy - one supporter to another, it's really nice to hear about the good and happy times. I don't have anything to add but thank you for sharing! Just cruising around the forum and thanks, I needed that reminder today.

Projection - in this case experiencing her hopelessness as your own emotion. I get this quite often too, but am learning to delineate better between what is my feeling and what is actually boyfriend's very intense feeling. In case it's helpful, my last psych pointed out that sympathy and...

Ah @gizmo :) ever reliable with the self-care sage advice. And I agree! @blue_eyes18, what I'm hearing from you is that you did absolutely everything you could and that couldn't fix things, which tells me that the challenges being faced were beyond your capacity to overcome. You're a limited and...

@0311Wife - you sound like you're pushing through scary, unfamiliar ground with one giant stride after another. It's really heartening to read about the positive steps that you've found the courage to take. As we say in Australia: go you good thing!

Ouch :( well there's not much arguing with that... sorry to hear that things have been so rough and tumultuous. She sounds very lost and full to the brim with pain. It sounds like you've done all you can to make a life together but if she's not ready, she's not ready. Maybe a case of right...

To be honest, his behaviour reminds me more of my last boyfriend (who doesn't have PTSD) than my current boyfriend (who does). PTSD could be a contributing factor but I would be wary of attributing all of his actions to his diagnosis. Sometimes people just do not nice things. Good job on...

@Sighs , I understand being confused by the sudden switch back to calmness after high emotion. It can take me an hour or two to return to baseline after a fight but boyfriend settles much much quicker, I think PTSD means his day-to-day baseline is high so there's less distance to fall back to...

@xena21 , you would need to clarify with your therapist, but from my perspective the reason they would have asked you to not email regarding suicidal thoughts is not because they don't want you to let them know that they're suicidal. It will be, in my opinion, because they don't want you to...

I have often been told by boyfriend that I should leave him. It's heart breaking to hear. When things are going better he's able to articulate that it's related to overwhelming guilt that he's letting me down. This is settling at the moment, but when it pops up it's a strong indication that he...

Ouch :( my heart breaks for you. All we can ever do is our best with the knowledge we have at the time. I've read some of your other posts elsewhere and it sounds like this relationship has been an intense learning journey where you have strived to do your best, and that's something you can...

Hi @Leanne1 Half of adults will seriously consider suicide at some point in their lives. We just don't talk about it heaps as a societ. I'm a supporter and just wanted to add that if you start feeling like you can't keep yourself safe please contact your local suicide line or emergency services...

And this. This is amazing, thank you. This will help me to be strong in continuing whatever I'm doing in my life when boyfriend is not doing well.

THANK YOU for this thread, it's put quite a few of boyfriend's behaviours into context. There are things that I thought were just him or depression, like the self-loathing and energy fluctuations, that sound like they are actually pretty standard for PTSD. And it seems I'll have to find a way to...

:( It's super hard missing the person you love when they're right next to you. Definitely one of the things I find the hardest. I wrote a sickening analogy about enjoying the sunshine patches on the journey out of the darkness, but I could barely stand proof reading it myself so I decided...

You can definitely say that you miss your baby :) I still miss my never-child occasionally... I make origami boats and animals for them sometimes. Somehow seeing a physical representation of them makes it easier to miss them. It's really hard to explain to people who haven't ended or lost a...

I'm glad to hear that you were able to share your secret and get support from someone in your life :) I don't agree with her black and white morality, what a terribly limited and limiting (and judgemental) way to view the world, but it sounds like talking with her was an overall positive...

Bruce Perry has written an excellent book on how trauma shapes the developing brain - The Boy Who Was Raised As A Dog. I'll give it a massive trigger warning though because it's a series of case studies on child abuse and neglect, very sensitively written and in many cases with happy endings...

You can definitely ask that! Clinical psychologists are supposed to follow treatment plans based on client goals, like all psychologists. Pushing someone to do trauma exposure when they're not ready... I have no words for how unprofessional that is. I would encourage you to be very honest...

@blue_eyes18 yup. Just... yup. Get out of my brain ;) I'm sorry to hear that things are so difficult and fraught for you right now. It sounds like your relationship is really important to you and that you're doing all you can but feeling like you're not getting very far and not being heard...

Interesting! Fat is a pretty ubiquitous substance that would be really hard to target therapeutically for PTSD (imo), cause if you start messing with myelin you'll end up with something like Multiple Sclerosis. But the stress hormones (cortisol and glucocorticoids) that trigger the switch of...

It's your choice as to how you want to direct your therapy :) if you want to focus on OCD symptoms, a good therapist might gently challenge around this if they see what they perceive to be a more pressing need, but will support your choices as you're the expert on being you. They're just there...

@Healing Reins, you can use whatever language works best for you :) I very rarely say that I had an "abortion" (I find it a really harsh sounding word) and usually refer to my experience as a "termination". Is there a word or phrase that would be easier for you to use? You also can start the...

I found seeing pregnant friends and friends' babies hugely upsetting for about 3 years after my abortion. I definitely understand how confusing, disorientating and just plain heart-wrenchingly painful seeing friends being pregnant and happy can be! For myself, and I know that I made the 100%...

@shimmerz, sounds like you and your SO have a wonderfully love-filled and supportive relationship :) thank you for sharing how different strategies have a positive effect for you and for your relationship. Great to hear that things can work smoothly. I'm realising that my preference for...

I can definitely relate to getting the emotional cold shoulder during a rough patch. It sucks. Feeling alone while you're physically with the person you love is heartbreaking. If he's saying that he feels numb he isn't necessarily saying that he doesn't love you, he could just simply be numb...