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I have C-PTSD too. My issue with touch is a bit different. I don't mind it from VERY few people- people I REALLY trust. But even then it can be hard. I cannot watch people be overly touchy- especially couples. That makes me sick. I also cannot watch mothers and daughters touch... GINORMOUS...

Ok so the session went good. Her friend that I was seeing while she was gone gave her a brief overview of how things had been going so we hit on the big issues. It was good to see her again. She is fighting to keep her old office and hopefully she wins. She said the move won't be for a while yet...

Well I'm here a little early like always. It gives me time to settle my mind before session. One good thing is that she has not changed offices yet so yay! At least this way everything isn't thrown at me at one time. Will update afterwards!

Thank you @barefoot I hope so. I see her in about 3 hours. I will share how it goes.. @KwanYingirl that will be something I can look into once I get on disability but right now all I have is charity care through insurance and its limited in what it covers. I manage okay if I am holding on and...

I typically don't mind change at all. In fact I normally embrace it. But for some reason I'm having a hard time with this. Some of it is I really don't like stairs due to I fall on them at least 2-3 times a week. A big part of it is having to walk through the lobby after hard sessions. Her old...

Thank you for the idea though and good thoughts. This is the second time she has been out for 6-8 weeks for surgeries (hopefully the last). Last time it was awkward the first day because the hour passed by way to quick and I didn't get to say everything. But atlas this week we have 2 sessions...

Thank you @KwanYingirl . My T is still going to let me sit on the porch and come get me so at least I won't have to climb them alone. Hopefully she will escort me as well. I know she will during EMDR sessions because we often go for a walk afterwards. I try to look at just one step but even then...

So my therapist has been out having surgery and recovering for 2 months. SOOOOOOO much has happened during these 2 months. Ive been seeing her friend which has been helpful but not the same. Thankfully I see her tomorrow and the next day (we were suppose to start EMDR) but I feel like I have SO...

Ok so just got back from my doctor's appointment (she is my primary but is also a neurologist) and feeling a little better about things. She agrees with the NES (non epileptic seizures) part of the diagnoses and definitely thinks my PTSD is a trigger- but not the cause. She was very...

Thank you all for the support. I live in Alabama and basically can't get on Medicaid unless i get pregnant. Go figure. @greenleaf I will read your post later. That's another issue I have- reading long in depth stuff at times. I use to be an avid reader. Now not so much...

I also have other symptoms aside from the episodes. Such as I do have headaches and migraines, balance issues, and more. My brain isn't thinking clearly this morning. One big thing is no one could explain why I developed pseudo tumor cerebri after my head injury. Well it says that chiari type 1...

I absolutely have the best therapist for me! I am so lucky. She is very compassionate, understanding, and funny. She helps me laugh at myself and also makes me feel safe enough to cry (which is HUGE). I could not do EMDR with anyone else. She is very intuitive to when I am starting to dissociate...

@Jet This was technically my 3rd opinion about the Chiari. I don't have true insurance- only charity care through the medical university hospital. I keep asking these doctors to refer me to the neurosurgeon who would know more about Chiari but they won't. @scout86 I haven't seen my T in like...

So I just was released from the hospital Thursday for a 4 day Video EEG. Back in April I started having random passing out spells and we couldn't figure out why. My doctor was quick to blame it on my PTSD and diabetes. It was only when my first EEG came back abnormal that she scheduled further...

Yeah definitely sounds like you are better off without her. I am so sorry, a good therapist is suppose to make you feel safe and comfortable. Keep searching for the right one. I would not give anything in this world for my therapist. She makes me feel safe, she cares, she helps me laugh at...

@Anna Roberts yes that is normal. I say that EMDR is like running an emotional and physical marathon combined. I normally feel better in a day or so, but EMDR often keeps working after the session so don't me surprised if memories come up. When doing EMDR I normally see my T twice a week.

It's an advertisement. I would talk to your T if I were you and didn't feel like I had enough resources. EMDR is NOT something you want to just into without them. I've been doing EMDR on and off a year now and we continue to find more resources because at certain times certain ones won't work...

@Anna Roberts it doesn't hurt but I would suggest making sure you have nothing planned afterwards. The best way for me to describe it is it's like running an emotional marathon- I am exhausted physically and emotionally afterwards. Make sure you and your therapist have a lot of coping skills...

EMDR is not for the faint of heart for sure. I'm on like my 6 or more target and we had to put it on hold because I have too much going on and couldn't process it. Did you and your therapist work on building up a supply of coping skills before hand? If not I would mention this to your...

Thank you @HollyBeans27, I would greatly appreciate the support. I hope you got what you needed from your T! I saw my T today instead of yesterday which ended up being really good because I had a complete breakdown last night and was on the verge of being suicidal. She has a friend that I saw...

Thank you @KwanYingirl i appreciate the positive thoughts. I do have a few symptoms which is helpful- but if it's already a bad day I don't notice them. @Dana1010 she just got the results of my EEG and it is indicating a seizure disorder. I have to have another EEG done. It's more than just my...

Thank you. She is ordering a heart monitor for a month and more bloodwork but otherwise they aren't doing too much about it. I seriously cannot afford to fall and hit my head again.

Thank you all for the support. My therapist was very supportive. I knew going in I would not be able to talk about what came up. So I wrote a letter to her explaining my feelings. She read it and said that we would address it at a later time but for now we need to focus on the original trauma...

@KwanYingirl we did MANY months of grounding skills and such before ever starting EMDR. It's incredibly hard work. He is probably waiting not on the flashbacks to stop, but to find some tools to help you stay present and not dissociate. I still have moments where the memories get overwhelming...

Thank you all for your responses. Its taken me a few days to calm down and decompress. Despite the desperate desire to call and cancel our session Wednesday, I will go. 1) because I know deep down its the right thing, 2) I have NEVER cancelled a session and my therapist will know why, and 3) I...