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Alexander

I will start with I have NO memories of anything like this. At all. HOWEVER she has some undeniable logic, and that's without some things I am too ashamed to tell her. I will be clear I grew up in a violent childhood home anyway, a lot of threats and chasing etc. However I have realised that...

Also welcome to the site :) I hope you find answers to your questions and support on here!! :)

To be honest, I do not often tell people I have PTSD, so I guess I don't have that much experience with seeing if people believe you, however I am not sure that is the issue. If your health practitioner and you yourself believe you have PTSD, that is about all that matters. It affects every part...

I am struggling to come to terms with exactly this at he moment. In my childhood fighting back got you hurt, speaking out of time got you hurt, not doing everything possible to make the other person's life easier got you yelled at and hurt. I had to predict everything and It was always about...

I feel like I am fainting/passing out of it is a bad one. Normal ones I have got quite good at handling and just deep breathing, but yeh, if one takes me by surprise I think through hyperventilating I just don't get enough air. I don't even realise I am doing it most of the time as well. I...

Kitten!! :smug:

Ahaha dw I didn't see your previous thread, so I will reply to this one! Not sure how much good advice I have though... I have always found sometimes 'over sharing' just means someone gets to see a very dramatic, unreasonable side of me that can damage relationships. Not to say that you...

I had this exact same dilemma twice. The first time I couldn't realistically press charges because I couldn't afford it and I had no evidence. The second time I was where you are now. All the evidence and everything brought in. I decided to press forward and the mental exhaustion of pressing...

To me guilt is feeling responsibility for an action ( your fault for not ) in a negative way. You look back on it as a bad choice. Shame is more of a humiliation where you feel embarrassed and disgusted by something about yourself or something that happened. But you don't have to feel...

Changes depending on my mood, which cycles pretty rapidly. Main ones are: - accepting it and feeling strong - accepting it and feeling pathetic - denying it and feeling fine - denying it and self destructing - accepting it and self destructing Though I can be at different stages of acceptance...

I have heard alot about EMDR, It may be worth giving it a go, my therapist at the moment doesn't do much of anything. Just chatting and working through issues. After a while it just feels like circles though. I may see if I can find anyone in the area who does it!

Thanks for the response! Context: CPTSD: Child abuse (emotional, physical, neglect), 3 separate sexual assaults from 17-20. One being a year of emotional abuse with some physical as well. I have been doing therapy on and off since I was 10. It just feels like an endless slog I have been doing...

Damn, I feel that. I do have like 2 friends and a boyfriend, so not exactly. But barely anyone really knows me, cliche as it is, and sometimes the thought you have to make up people in your head to have acceptance is plain depressing. Welcome to the community, and I hope you can make some...

My PTSD feels like some kind of fractured dream scape, where there is no sense to be had, and no rhyme or reason. Nothing makes any particular sense and even my own sense of self changes at random intervals. Now I need to try and make sense of the madness and despite years of trying I am nearly...

Wow. That title was way more dramatic than intended. But it is kind of what I am thinking right now. I feel fluctuating between everything being awful, and wallowing in my life story and panic attacks and drama and god I think I sicken myself sometimes with how annoying I sound even to myself...

^^^ Sorry, but that quote is so good xD maybe I should name my boyfriends 'McFrosty poo poo' personality ahhaha.

Spend an evening relaxing without my mind going to to dark places Concentrate on games I used to love Enjoy going out without panic attacks Not have panic attacks... that would be awesome! Have a cat...I really want a cat god damnit! :P

My bf does that first one a lot when he is angry... Makes discussing any issues pretty hard because it always ends with 'I am not good enough for you so just leave.' which is like a non-conclusion, drives me insane. I don't think it is a fair way to act, but when I lose it I am not very nice...

Welcome :) <--- delayed reply ahahah

I am not sure I am connected enough to my little me to feel much for her. But then little me died after the house fire... I guess I need to work on connecting to her before I can feel much for her. I guess I feel sorry for her, she was very scared. Sorry that was kinda disconnected from the...

Wow. That sounds like my life until I moved out... Not exactly, but I spent most of my life until I was 20 running around and helping everyone without even a thank you. I totally understand the anger, its exhausting to give you all you have got, and get nothing in return. I know this sounds...

I have had flashbacks in my sleep multiple times, so yes it is very possible. I hope your heads okay 0.o.

Okay guys, thanks for all these responses! I am going to do it next session or I never will. And if she laughs at me I shall deal with it. Best case scenario I have someone professional to deal with it instead of it spiraling around my brain. I think that would be helpful for me. Thanks...

- I mainly go to places when they are less busy - Paces like on the way to work (tubes etc) I put my headphones in and close my eyes or read a book, anything to distract me. I know I can't escape the situations, it doesn't stop me having panic attacks, but I have got very good at having them...